Mondays 8:00 PM on CBS

And kids, that's how I met your mother. Psych! It was just some chick.

Ted: Robin you want to get...
Robin: (Raspberry Sound) Get it together bro.

Ted: Do you know how many people it takes to change fifty-thousand light bulbs?
Barney: Are these people Irish? Polish? Blondes? What are we dealing with here?

Sometimes things have to fall apart to make way for better things...we're done here.

New York is never finished Theodore. She's a lady only a handful of architects ever get to dance with. Do not miss your turn.


First of all, no ninja is getting the jump on me.

Kids, don't drink tequila.

Can you get STD's from the ghost of a prostitute?

I can handle you preventing me from fulfilling a life long dream, that's being in a relationship.

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