The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXPopular The Simpsons Quotes
Larry: What you got riding on this?
Homer: My daughter.
Larry: What a gambler!
Maggie? Oh, you must be sick. Let's see, what's old Dr. Washburn prescibe? Do you have dropsy? The grippe? Scofula? The vapors? Jungle rot? Dandy fever? Poor man's gout? Housemaid's knee? Climatic poopow? The staggers? Dum-dum fever?
</i> Abe
You call that a left testicle, Toot?
Mo
Damn TV, you've ruined my imagination, just like you've ruined my ability to...uh...
Bart
Oh my, God. Simon set me up. And all this time I thought he wanted the life of a stranger he met in the bathroom.
Bart
(To Homer) Now if you'll excuse me, I have to appear on a tortilla in Mexico.
God
Homer: That is the most amazing doughnut I've ever tasted
Mr. Burns: Well, if you stay on with the Springfield nuclear plant, you could have one of these tasty beauties every day.
Lenny [about doughnut]: One of these every day might kill us.
Carl: Can we get a health plan to go with them?
Mr. Burns: Sure, you could have a health care or.... two donuts a day.
Lisa: You're all forgetting the most important thing! Which is that it's wrong to imprison an animal!
Homer: Lisa, go to your room.
Why am I sleeping when right next door is every kid's dream - - a fat, suggestible, zombie dad?
Bart
Marge: Remember, on the road the only vice you can indulge in is gluttony. Save lust and rage for me and the kids.
Homer: Honey, don't worry, I'm gonna come back so horny and angry.
You always do the right thing...sort of.
Marge
Surly: Hey, Surly only looks out for one guy...Surly!
Selma: Oh, sorry Surly.
Surly: Shut up.
