A Cultured Family - The Simpsons

A Cultured Family - The Simpsons

Lisa learns what it might be like to live with a more cultured family on The Simpsons. "The Girl on the Bus" is the 12th episode of the show's 30th season.
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A Post-War Toy Model - The Simpsons

A Post-War Toy Model - The Simpsons

Grampa was once a post-war toy model on The Simpsons. "Mad About the Toy" is the 11th episode of the show's 30th season.
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Fixing Christmas - The Simpsons

Fixing Christmas - The Simpsons

Marge tries to fix Christmas on The Simpsons. "Tis the 30th Season" is the tenth episode of the show's 30th season.
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Bonding - The Simpsons

Bonding - The Simpsons

Lisa and Homer bond while spending more time together on The Simpsons. "Daddicus Finch" is the ninth episode of the show's 30th season.
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Harsh Critique - The Simpsons

Harsh Critique - The Simpsons

Homer's harsh critique causes issues with Krusty on The Simpsons. "Krusty the Clown" is the eighth episode of the show's 30th season.
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Drag Queen - The Simpsons

Drag Queen - The Simpsons

Marge ends up working as a drag queen on The Simpsons. "Werking Mom" is the seventh episode of the show's 30th season.
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Mail-Order Bride - The Simpsons

Mail-Order Bride - The Simpsons

Bart, Nelson and Milhouse get Moe a mail-order bride on The Simpsons. "From Russia Without Love" is the sixth episode of the show's 30th season.
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A Fun Work Environment - The Simpsons

A Fun Work Environment - The Simpsons

A self-driving car company with a fun work environment poaches employees from the power plan on The Simpsons. "Baby You Can't Drive My Car" is the fifth episode of the show's 30th season.
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Lisa Snaps - The Simpsons

Lisa Snaps - The Simpsons

Lisa finally snaps in this Halloween-themed installment on The Simpsons. "Treehouse of Horror XXIX" is the fourth episode of the show's 30th season.
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Divine Encounters - The Simpsons

Divine Encounters - The Simpsons

Lisa recalls having a divine encounter on The Simpsons. "My Way or the Highway to Heaven" is the third episode of the show's 30th season.
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Reality TV - The Simpsons

Reality TV - The Simpsons

Marge and Homer compete on a reality TV show on The Simpsons. "Heartbreak Hotel" is the second episode of the show's 30th season.
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Meeting Jesus - The Simpsons

Meeting Jesus - The Simpsons

In order to cover a dare, Bart claims to have met Jesus on The Simpsons. "Bart's Not Dead" is the first episode of the show's 30th season.
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The Simpsons Quotes

Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!
Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!
Homer: D'oh!

The Monorail Song
Lyle Lanley: Y'know, a town with money is like a mule with a spinning wheel. No one knows how he got it and danged if he knows how to use it!
(audience laughs)
Homer: Heh heh! Mule.
Lyle Lanley: The name's Lanley. Lyle Lanley. And I come before you good people tonight with an idea. Probably the greatest... Aw, it's not for you. It's more of a Shelbyville idea.
Mayor Quimby: Now wait just a minute! We're twice as smart as the people of Shelbyville! Just tell us your idea and we'll vote for it!
Lyle Lanley: All right, I tell you what I'll do. I'll show you my idea! I give you the Springfield Monorail! (audience gasps) I've sold monorails to Brockway, Ogdenville, and North Haverbrooke, and by gum, it put them on the map!
Well, sir, there's nothing on earth
Like a genuine,
Bona fide,
Electrified,
Six-car
Monorail! ...
What'd I say?
Ned Flanders: Monorail!
Lyle Lanley: What's it called?
Patty & Selma: Monorail!
Lyle Lanley: That's right! Monorail!
(crowd chants "Monorail" softly and rhythmically)
Miss Hoover: I hear those things are awfully loud.
Lyle Lanley: It glides as softly as a cloud.
Apu: Is there a chance the track could bend?
Lyle Lanley: Not on your life, my Hindu friend.
Barney: What about us brain-dead slobs?
Lyle Lanley: You'll all be given cushy jobs.
Grampa: Were you sent here by the devil?
Lyle Lanley: No, good sir, I'm on the level.
Chief Wiggum: The ring came off my pudding can.
Lyle Lanley: Take my pen knife, my good man.
I swear it's Springfield's only choice...
Throw up your hands and raise your voice!
All: Monorail!
Lyle Lanley: What's it called?
All: Monorail!
Lyle Lanley: Once again...
All: Monorail!
Marge: But Main Street's still all cracked and broken!
Bart: Sorry, Mom, the mob has spoken.
All: Monorail!
Monorail!
Monorail!
Monorail!
Homer: Mono... D'oh!