Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season 2 Episode 18: "Killed by Death" Quotes
Willow: Buffy’s not in here for cosmetic surgery.
Cordelia: No, but while she’s in here she might as well get that thing done. You know, that thing on her face. You know...that thing.
Willow: Do you think Angel will attack Buffy in here?
Xander: He can come in. It’s a public building.
Willow: That’s true.
Cordelia: Am I the only one that’s noticed that thing?!
Cordelia: What about you?
Xander: I’m going to stay here.
Cordelia: Oh, right. Your obsession with protecting Buffy. Have I told you how attractive that's not?
Xander: Cordelia, someone's gotta watch her back.
Cordelia: Yeah well, I've seen you watch her back.
Xander: What is that supposed to mean?
Cordelia: Well, I was using the phrase 'watch her back' as a euphemism for 'looking at her butt.' You know, sort of a pun.
Willow: I'm good at medical stuff, since Xander and I used to play doctor all the time.
[Xander laughs uncomfortably and Cordelia stares him daggers]
Xander: No, she's being literal. She used to have all these medical volumes and diagnosed me with stuff. I didn't have the heart to tell her she was playing it wrong.
Willow: Wrong? Why? How did you play doctor?
Buffy: I...never have.
Angelus: If I decide to walk into Buffy's room, do you even believe for a micro-second that you could stop me?
Xander: Maybe not. Maybe that security guard couldn't either, or those cops or the orderlies, but I'm kind of curious to find out. You game?
Angelus: Buffy's white knight. You still love her.
[Angelus whispers]
Angelus: It must just eat you up that I got there first.
Xander: You're gonna die and I'm gonna there.
[Angelus gives Xander the flowers for Buffy]
Angelus: Tell her I stopped by.
Buffy: Maybe it wasn’t Death? Maybe it was something else?
Cordelia: So, this isn’t about you being afraid of hospitals ‘cause your friend died and you wanna conjure up a monster that you can fight, so you can save everybody and not feel so helpless?
Giles: Cordelia, have you actually ever heard of tact?
Cordelia: Tact is just not saying true stuff. I'll pass.
Cordelia: Eww, what does this do?
Giles: What?
Cordelia: What does this do?
Giles: Uh, it extracts vital organs to replenish its own mutating cells.
Cordelia: Wow. What does this one do?
Giles: Um, it elongates its mouth to, uh, engulf its victim's head with its incisors.
Cordelia: Ouch. Wait, what does this one do?
Giles: It asks endless questions of those with whom it's supposed to be working so that nothing is getting done.
Cordelia: Boy, there's a demon for everything.
