I want to leave quietly, it seemed dignified. But having Kevin grind up on my front, while Erin pretended to hump me from behind, it was a more accurate tribute to my years here. I'm gonna miss these guys.

Darryl

Not enough for me? You are everything.

Jim (to Pam)

Dwight: You're a good assistant Jim.
Jim: Not as good as you.
Dwight: That's very true. Get the hell out of here.

Dwight: We're third cousins, which is great for bloodlines and isn't technically incest.
Jim: Right in the sweet spot.

The two of you would move to my 16 hundred acre estate, which let's face it, is a big step up from living in a gay man's closet.

Dwight

Anyone who needs to speak to me has gotta go through me first.

Dwight

Get upstairs mister!

Erin (to Daryl)

By two o'clock Dwight will choose himself to be the assistant to his own assistant, me.

Jim

Pete: Plop? Still?
Dwight: We owe Andy that much.

If my parents see this, I am toast.

Creed

On this show, all three judges are mean.

Andy

Saddle shoes with denim? I will literally call protective services.

Oscar

The Office Quotes

Sometimes I'll start a sentence, and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way. Like an improv conversation. An improversation.

Michael

David, here it is. My philosophy is basically this. And this is something that I live by. And I always have. And I always will. Don't ever, for any reason, do anything to anyone, for any reason, ever, no matter what. No matter... where. Or who, or who you are with, or, or where you are going, or... or where you've been... ever. For any reason, whatsoever.

Michael