I definitely want to try again with Vinny, I actually named his penis Moby Dick.

Thank you, Mike, because you're an a—hole and we hate you and you're a bad person and you were born in 1965.

Whatever... f*%k my life. Sh!t happens.

Can you look at me real quick?! WATCH THE ROAD!!!! But do I look hot???

If you don't want to cuddle, thanks for the braciola but no dinner dates with you and me, goodbye, never see you again.

The staircase is really small and the bed is really wide. It's kind of like an analogy of Vinny's penis not fitting in my pinhole.

Jenni looks so hot. Like porn star hot. If Roger wasn't here then I would probably have sex with her.

[on Jwoww] I got a boner.

I look like a hot drunk baseball player right now and I'm lovin' it. BATTER UP, BITCHES!

I hate the ocean, it's all whale sperm. Everybody Google it, because that's why the water is salty, from the f**kin' whale sperm.

Jeff is ready to do moves on me... but really I had my friggin' period. Story of my life.

I told [Pauly D] I'm taking his sperm and making babies out of it.

Nicole 'Snooki' Polizzi Quotes

Friggin' duck phone!


He's a really good guy. That's the kind of guy I need in my life. I think his name is Ron.