Love: My dad is going to love that shirt.
Joe Voiceover: I know. I do my research.

You are a lot of things, but you're not stupid.

Delilah

Candace: Will Bettelheim. What a great name. Almost sounds made up.
Joe Voiceover: Is she trying to spar with me?
Joe: It's funny, I was just thinking Amy Adam, how totally ungoogleable.

Like the kids say, fuck my life.

Joe

Joe: What are you doing here?
Candace: I told you I'd show up to give you what you deserve. So here we are. Merry Christmas!

Of course, your brother destroyed my life. Our life. I was trying to help you, Love. Altruism is dangerous.

Joe Voiceover

Dottie: Ah, to be young.
Joe: Oh you're still young.
Dottie: Tell that to my vagina. No one warns you one day you wake up dryer than the Sahara.

She can't hold a knife. One swift move and no, no she's wrong. I don't hurt people, especially women, especially women who are out of their minds. That's not me.

Joe Voiceover

Joe: You don't want to protect them. You want to hurt me. Go ahead. Do it. 
Candace: I can't!
Joe: It's a lot harder than it looks. 

Joe: I really think this is just some misunderstanding.
Candace: Stop gaslighting me.

It's not eczema, Forty. Addiction is not an on and off thing, and it's no excuse for being a bum.

Ray

Dottie: You've done enough. All you ever have to do is keep your brother safe. You've failed.
Love: You're a fucking hypocrite!

YOU Season 2 Episode 5 Quotes

Joe: I'm not afraid of you anymore. If you really had something on me, you would have turned me in already.
Candace: I'm not afraid of you either.
Joe: Why would you be afraid of me? Candace, it was an accident. End of story. I never tried to kill you.
Candace: You know what they say? You never know if you're fight or flight until you're forced to find out. Turns out, I'm fight. So now I've found you. I'm not going anywhere, and I don't care what you tell yourself because all I have to do is wait for you to mess up. Murder has a way of following you, and you're not getting away with it.

I don't think I've ever been in love before. It's been infatuation. This is it. Accepting you're not perfect and loving you more for it. 

Joe Voiceover