Chris: Welcome to our home Mrs. Brinkley.
Reagan: Now I can answer the phone without feeling like a slut.

Ava: This is the last time I'm going to be just medium famous.
Walter: It's all gonna change for us now. We'll probably both need Blackberry's.

Chris: Look if our guests see my well toned get away sticks, they're gonna say Reagan who?
Mr. Brinkley: Chris this is no time to be Jay Leno.

Chris: You know what my favorite Combo is?
Reagan: Zesty Salsa Tortilla?
Chris; No, us.
Reagan: Honey! That is so lame.

Reagan: You know I hate it when guys pee outside right?
Chris: Hate it or jealous?
Reagan: Jealous.

We finally finished The Wire.


See this little angel right here? She likes to hide car keys.


Get off my side!


FYI nobody calls my brother a dumb ass but me and secondly your pas de chat's super rigid.


Are you second hand smoking? It's a totally slippery slope dude. You go from piggybacking a guys smoke. Next thing you know you're giving your daughter's wedding toast through a hole in your neck. What a joyous occasion.


Scott: Wine em, dine em and redesign em.
Ava: I like mine no ice and no margarita mix. Then it's just tequila.

I'd love you to never say full coitus again.


Up All Night Quotes

Who knows, maybe I'll get the old Nordic Track out.


Reagan: Stop saying baby in there, like there's a baby hiding in the closet with a knife or something.
Chris: Why are we whispering?