Rachel: I just I don't think there's any way that we're coming back from this one.
Quinn: Good. We can do better.

Madison: Congratulations! I mean, I always said you should be running this place. I think we should go get a drink sometime!
Jay: Sorry, Maddie. Mine's one dick you can't suck.

Rachel: You were supposed to put the gun to my head!
Quinn: I could never do that to you, Rachel. Never.

Rachel: You wouldn’t have loved the real me anyway.
Tommy: You never gave me the chance.

Graham: I'm so glad you're back, Quinn. Don't know if you know this or not, but I never think of the audience when I'm delivering my cerebral repartee. I'm only doing it for you.
Quinn: Aw, that touches me. Right in my bile duct.

Rachel: What's going on? We have a finale to produce! I mean, why is everybody standing around with their dick in their hands?
Noelle: Wow, nice. All class.

Rachel: I'm really ready to change.
Quinn: Really, are you sure?
Rachel: Yeah.
Quinn: Because as far as I can tell, you're still the same lost, self-indulgent spoiled brat you were the day I met you.

Madison: Oh, my God, Quinn, I saw that amazing picture that Chet posted with you and Chet Jr. It's seriously so adorable! I shared it, I liked it. #StepmommiesRule, #MommyBoss.
Quinn: You posted that?
Chet: #DeathByCuteness. #Quinning?

You know, look, uh, you and I both know that Sofia isn't in the same league as Noelle. But I guess it's easier to sacrifice a star than face your own guilt.


Jack: All the women here are nothing but good-for-nothing liars!
Quinn: And another satisfied Goldberg customer.
Jay: I thought you lived for this kind of stuff.
Quinn: I used to.

We are men. And as men, we have faced challenges of strength, wits, and ingenuity. But women across the ages have placed the highest value on another skill. Listening. Or at least I think that's what they said. I just remember blah, blah, blah.


I don't know if you've figured this out yet or not, but Rachel's a contestant playing her own game, and all of you are just collateral damage.


UnREAL Quotes

Welcome back to reality, Rachel.


8 weeks if you're lucky, one night if not.