This is K-U-D-D 570 AM. Hey, don't touch that dial, you've got KUDD on it.

DJ

Homer: Ooh, there's a good one!
Marge: That spot says compact only!
Homer: Marge, that's just the suggestion car size...easy...easy... how am I doing on the right?
Lisa: Um, we're getting a lot of sparks over here, dad!
Homer: Uh huh, easy...easy...mmm perfect, alright everybody out the window!

Marge: Well, what are we going to see?
Bart: Ernest Cuts The Cheese!
Lisa: Honey I Hit A School Bus!
Homer: Look Who's Oinking, Look Who's Oinking!
Marge: Since we'll never agree, why don't you kids pick a movie, your dad and I will pick a movie, then we'll all meet in the lobby later?
Bart/Lisa: Thanks mom!
Homer: Two tickets for...
Guy: Lemme guess... Look Who's Oinking?
Homer: That's right!
Guy: Sold out!

Lurleen's Song: That's why you flipped your pickup truck, right off the interstate!
Homer: That's right (fast) except for the pickup truck.

Guy: Lets give a big country welcome to Yodeling Zeek!
Audience: *applause*
Zeek: Yodel-e-hee, yodel-e-i-hee, odel-e-hee.

Redneck 1: Hey you, let's fight.
Redneck 2: Them's fightin' words!

Hillbilly 1: I caught my wife in bed with my best friend.
Hillbilly 2: You bitter?
Hillbilly 1: Yeah, bit HIM too!

Homer: I'm going now, and I don't know when you'll see me again
(he drives off, then comes back to drop Maggie off)
Lisa: I guess that executive stress ball we got him for Christmas isn't working.

Studio Owner: Ah, this studio has a lot of history, uh.. Buddy Holly stood on this spot in 1958 and said 'There is no way in hell that I'm going to record in this dump'
Homer: I'm sure Lurleen will love it!
Marge: Homer, how much did you just give that man!
Homer: Calm down Marge, it's just our life savings!

Homer: Oh no, I went to this bar the other night and the.
Moe: Hey, wawait a minute. You went to another bar?
Homer: Moe, I was 100 miles out of town!
Moe: Oh Homer...

(on a mechanical bull) Ach! How come no one else's chair is doin' this?!

Willy

Lurleen: My name's Lurleen Lumpkin.
Homer: That's a pretty name.
Lurleen: Oh, you think so?
Homer: Maybe. I'm not sure. I forgot it.

The Simpsons Season 3 Quotes

Horst: (Sinister) Okay, Mr. Burns, you win. But beware. We Germans aren't all smiles and sunshine.
Mr. Burns: (Sarcastic) Oooh, the Germans are mad at me. I'm so scared! Oooh, the Germans! (Hiding behind Smithers) Uh oh, the Germans are going to get me!
Horst: Stop it!
Man: Stop, sir.
Mr. Burns: Don't let the Germans come after me. Oh no, the Germans are coming after me.
Man: Please stop the "pretending you are scared" game, please.
Horst: Stop it! Stop it!
Mr. Burns: (Pause) No! They're so big and strong!
Man: Stop it.
Horst: Stop it, Mr. Burns.
Man: Please stop pretending you are scared of us, please, now.
Mr. Burns: Oh, protect me from the Germans! The Germans--
Horst: Burns, Stop it!

Officer Eddie: (reading Steve Sax's license) Well well, Steve Sax, from New York City.
Officer Lou: I heard some guy got killed in New York City and they never solved the case. But you wouldn't know anything about that now, would you, Steve?
(Lou and Eddie laugh)
Steve Sax: But there are hundreds of unsolved murders in New York City.
Officer Lou: You don't know when to keep your mouth shut, do you, Saxxy Boy?