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The-simpsons

I'm afraid wives don't make passes at husbands who wear those glasses.

Marge

Bart: Homer, Will you take me to buy a comic book Tuesday at midnight?
Homer: And miss the back half of Jimmy Kimmel? That's when he experiments, boy.

I cannot hide the snide inside!

Comic book guy

The closest thing I have to a father is the Obi-Wan doll in my store, and he comes from a race of celibate knights so...

Comic Book Guy

Nerds don't get girls!

Comic Book Guy

I'm here to arrest and hopefully stage the prison suicide of the mastermind of this operation - Homer Simpson.

FBI Agent

Lenny(on piracy): That was so much better than the cinema. It mixes the wonder of movie-going with the rush of stealing.
Carl: All we want is brand new, big-budget entertainment in our homes for nothing. Why doesn't Hollywood get that?

That was the greatest thing I've seen on a computer that I could talk about with you in the room.

Homer

If I wanted to pay for commercials I can't skip, I'd sign up for Hulu Plus.

Homer

Homer: Wait, you guys saw the new Radioactive man sequel?
Carl: Uh, it's not sequel,it's a reboot.
Lenny: Actually, this one undoes the stuff from the last one, so it's a deboot.

Well, there's a rec room off the kitchen. But sometimes it's there and sometimes it isn't. Our house is very odd that way.

Marge

Quimby: Don't you idiots see what this means.
Lenny: Idiots? Why do we re-elect this guy?
Carl: Because his opponent has a long Slavic name.

Displaying quotes 49 - 60 of 3399 in total

The Simpsons Quotes

"No one ever told me I mattered before."

Meg

Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!
Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!
Homer: D'oh!

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