Sundays 8:00 PM on FOX
The-simpsons

It's not selling out. It's co-branding. Co-branding!

Homer

Oh, why are you doing this to me booze, I drank every kind of you.

Homer

Lenny: Why do they call this a yard of ale?
Carl: Easy, after you drink it, you're passed out in a yard.

Do you know how embarrassed I was to get a call at my arraignment for my behavior during the pub crawl because of a voodoo curse my son placed on his art teacher?

Homer

A minute of fun a lifetime of work. I've never heard of a pregnancy like this.

Bart

Wow, now I see why they call you Miss Hoover. You must have been vacuuming for an hour.

Bart

You used up all your clones you fat, fat, fat reckless, fat pig.

Frink

Marge:You can live with your no good son.
Bart: Hey, what did I do?
Marge: Nothing for thirty years. You're perfect for each other.

Homer: I am as healthy as a horse.
Marge: Horses only live thirty years.

A fat kid with a dream. I can't compete with that.

Milhouse

He's just Ralph with a dream, the dream of not ralphing.

Lisa

Homer: Whoo hoo! I've got a date with my daughter!
Cletus: Yeah, we've all been there. No need to act like you just invented air conditioning.

Displaying quotes 13 - 24 of 3399 in total

The Simpsons Quotes

"No one ever told me I mattered before."

Meg

Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!
Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!
Homer: D'oh!

×