Homer: Marge I believe you're forgetting America's greatest wartime wheelchair-bound leader, Professor X of the X-Men.
Marge: It's not that Professor X wouldn't get up, it's that he couldn't!

• Permalink: It's not that Professor X wouldn't get up, it's that he couldn't!
• Added: February 08, 2015

Bart: Aw jeez, I thought writing another hit song would be easier.
Lisa: Well it would have helped if you hadn't crumpled up all the paper before we wrote anything on it.

• Permalink: Well it would have helped if you hadn't crumpled up all the paper before we wrote anything on...
• Added: February 08, 2015

Marge, you're my wife of ten years and I love you, but I must observe the teachings of this man I just met tonight. Now the first thing I have to do is make amends with the bathroom scale.

Homer

• Permalink: Marge, you're my wife of ten years and I love you, but I must observe the teachings of this...
• Added: February 08, 2015

I have so many questions for you. First of all, is this floor reinforced?

Homer

• Permalink: I have so many questions for you. First of all, is this floor reinforced?
• Added: February 08, 2015

Bart: Thinking back, I'm kinda surprised mom and dad let a crazy man spend all night in my bedroom.
Homer: Simpler times.

• Permalink: Thinking back, I'm kinda surprised mom and dad let a crazy man spend all night in my bedroom.
• Added: February 08, 2015

I didn't write it. I bought it from a salesman who was selling it to half the towns in America. I didn't think you'd find out because I never thought any of us would go anywhere.

Moleman

• Permalink: I didn't write it. I bought it from a salesman who was selling it to half the towns in...
• Added: February 08, 2015