No this is not our first wedding. This is the THIRD wedding that Scrantonicity has played. We also played our bassist's wedding ... and our guitarist's wedding.


Michael: Phyllis! Are you happy with everything? What can I do to make it more perfecter?
Phyllis: It's beautiful. Why don't you find your seat. Enjoy the buffet.
Michael: I'm already on it. The chicken? Totally undercooked. I sent it back.
Phyllis: It's fish.
Michael: I will take care of that.

Dwight: Best of luck, Phyllis. Also I'm going to need to see a copy of the guest manifest as well as photographs of the caterers.
Phyllis: I don't have that, Dwight.
Dwight: Dammit, Phyllis!

Michael: Congratulations, Bob. You're a good man. But just know... if you ever lay a finger on Phyllis, I will kill you.
Bob Vance: If you ever lay I finger on Phyllis, I'll kill you.
Michael: Agreed. No fingers will be laid on Phyllis.

Angela: Congratulations, Phyllis. You look lovely. Your dress is very white. So white, my eyes are burning.
Phyllis: Thanks Angela.

Priest: And do you, Phyllis, take Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration, to be your lawfully wedded husband?
Phyllis: I do.
Michael: Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present to you for the first time as a couple, Mr. and Mrs. Bob Vance!
Priest: And do you, Bob-
Michael: Oh, shi-

This strappy young lad sitting here is Phyllis' father, Albert, and he is quite the ladies' man, aren't you Albert, hah? Ah, ringbearer. I could have done better. I will do better. I am going to be better. I can't believe I'm actually doing this! Ooh! Are you ready for this, Albert? I am. Let's do it.


Kelly: Could you scoot over? You're on my dress.
Meredith: I thought you're not supposed to wear white to a wedding.
Kelly: I know but there was an emergency.

You might be surprised to learn that I've only been to one other wedding. It's actually a very cute story. My Mom was marrying Jeff. And they asked me to be ring bearer. I was understandably emotional and somehow my pants became wet.

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