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Here's the sitch. Two weeks ago, I was in the worst relationship of my life. She treated me poorly. We didn't connect, I was miserable. Now, I'm in the best relationship of my life with the same woman. Love is a mystery.

Michael

Karen: So what's going to happen to us when I get this job?
Jim: Oh do you mean when I get the job?
Karen: Well, if you get the job then I'd move here with you. Would you move with me? I'm not stupid. I was at the beach. We won't have a future in Scranton. There's one too many people there.
Jim: You mean Kevin?
Karen: Exactly. But you get it, right? Can't stay there.
Jim: Yeah, I do. C'mon.

Dwight: You showed great leadership potential at the coal walk. Even if you did follow it with that embarrassing personal confession.
Pam: Thank you.
Dwight: I had to make Andy my number two. It's political, complicated, you wouldn't understand. I want you... to be Assistant Regional Manager.
Pam: Really?
Dwight: Well, in a sense. Although, publicly I am going to retain the Assistant Regional Manager position.
Pam: You will be your own assistant.
Dwight: Correct, I need someone I can trust. But I would also like the title... to be secretly applied to you. Just stripped of its pomp and frills.
Pam: Okay. So... you would be the Regional Manager, and the Assistant Regional Manager. Andy is your number two. I would be the Secret Assistant Regional Manager.
Dwight: Mmmmmm, let's call it Secret Assistant to the Regional Manager.
Pam: Mm-hmm.
Dwight: Do you accept?
Pam: Absolutely, I do.

I literally cannot wait to see what Dwight has planned. And I wish Jim were here.

Pam

Jan: Hey you!
Michael: Hey.
Jan: How was your interview?
Michael: Pretty good.
Jan: Yeah?
Michael: Could have gone better I guess.
Jan: Oh. I'll put in a good word for you.
Michael: Cool. Maybe you should do it sooner rather than later.
Jan: What?

Andy: It's like staring into my soul, when I look at this wall.
Dwight: It's like outer space without the stars, it's so black.
Andy: This is gonna look so awesome!
Dwight: It's so intimidating! Anyone who comes in here... is gonna have to take me seriously. Abandon all hope, ye who enter here!
Andy: Totally!

I'm a very good interviewee. Why? Because I have something that nobody else has. And that is... my brain. Which makes me charming, witty, intelligent... [long pause] and quick on my feet.

Andy

Dwight: Who was the second man on the moon?
Andy: Trick question. There was no second man on the moon.
Dwight: Inventor of the cotton gin.
Andy: Eli Edison.
Dwight: Talk me through an appendectomy.
Andy: Step 1, disinfection. Step 2, incision. Step 3, remove the appendix tenderly so it doesn't burst and spread toxic...icity everywhere.
Dwight: Step 5, the wound.
Andy: Re-suture. Sutures, yes.
Dwight: When is the Paleolithic Age?
Andy: 17 B.C.
Dwight: What is a scented candle?

How is the new boss? Tough. Do people respect him? They have to. Do they like him? Irrelevant. They do not. And I hate them back.

Dwight

Michael: There they are, the Accounting Department. I shall miss your humility and your promptly printed checks.
Kevin: Do you think it's gonna to be weird working with Jan in New York?
Michael: No. Not at all. I haven't talked to Jan since we broke up, and I think if she had something to say she would have called me.
Oscar: Maybe you should talk to her? Before...
Michael: No, no, no. You know what? It's a done deal. I basically have the job already. There's nothing she can do to stop it now. I already sold my condo.

www.creedthoughts.gov.www/creedthoughts. Check it out.

Creed

Oscar: Hey, Pam I've been meaning to say something to you. I really miss our friendship.
Pam: Wow, very funny.
Stanley: I've never heard you talk that much. I thought it was Kelly.
Kelly: Are you kidding? I would have never done that. It was pathetic-ville. No offense, Pam.
Meredith: You know what? Don't even worry about it. Everyone was so drunk, I bet no one even remembers what you said.
Creed: I remember. I blogged the whole thing.

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The Office Season 3 Quotes

Bros before hoes. Why? Because your bros are always there for you. They got your back after your ho rips your heart out for no good reason. And you were nothing but great to your ho, and you told her that she was the only ho for you. And that she was better than all the other hoes in the world. And then suddenly... she's not yo' ho no mo'.

Michael

I am ready to face any challenges that might be foolish enough to face me.

Dwight