The Office Season 6 Episode 11: "Shareholder Meeting" Quotes
Michael: Alright. Well, I know a guy. This Mexican guy, he's a math wiz. He knows economics as well as he knows bullfighting and I am going to call in a little favor.
David: No-no-no-no, don't call anybody, Michael.
Michael: Well I'm texting him, so.
David: Please do not text anybody now, Michael.
- Permalink: Alright. Well, I know a guy. This Mexican guy, he's a math wiz. ...
Michael: Well. That was a waste of a text. Let's get down to brass tacks. I think that we might be in trouble. We don't seem to have a plan, so I'm thinking I go down there maybe rattle off a few jokes. The Congressman could follow?
Alan: He's our best manager? Where's the off button on this moron?
Michael: Uhh. I'm not a moron. Time after time, my branch, leads in sales. I have personally won over 17 Dundie awards so I am not a moron. And, I'm just trying to help, you know? So... you're the moron.
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Alright. We are gonna ... we are gonna go out there, during this break, and we are gonna come back with a plan. We're gonna come back with a plan for you. It's a 45-day plan. 45 days! To get us back, on track. 45 points! It's a 45-day, 45-point, one point per day. We get 45 points, we're back in business! [cheers] And you can take that to the bank! And limo lady! We are going completely carbon-neutral! [more cheers] I love you New York! You! You!Michael
- Permalink: Alright. We are gonna ... we are gonna go out there, during this...
Andy: I'm so jealous right now.
Michael: Hey, you know who you shouldn't be jealous of. Yourself. Because you're invited, and you're invited, and you're invited, and you, you and you and you, and you--
Limo driver: Car seats eight.
Limo driver: The car seats eight.
Michael: The limo seats eight.
Michael: Okay. Then Jim and Pam. And Ryan plus a guest.
Jim and Pam: No thanks.
Ryan: I'll use it when you're done.
- Permalink: I'm so jealous right now. Hey, you know who you shouldn't be j...
Michael: I wish the windows weren't tinted so people could see us in here.
Andy: Hey you guys do you think anyone might have had sex in here?
Dwight: Definitely, definitely! Smells like it!
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Andy: Michael, what if somebody asks you a question at this meeting? Are you just going to wave or what-
Michael: I will have to answer!
Dwight: I'll ask you a question!
Andy: Make it a softball. Something he can, like, crank out of the park.
Dwight: "Michael Scott, you run the most profitable branch of Dunder Mifflin. How do you do it?"
Michael: No! No! That's too hard. Say! "Your name is Zamboni." And then I will say, "Well! We're sort of on thin ice."
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I've always been the guy who can rally other people to rebel. In high school, I organized a walk out over standardized testing. Got over 500 students to just skip the SATs. At the last second I chickened out, took it anyway got a 1220. Always regretted it... I feel lachrymose.Andy
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Jim: Let me show you what I mean. Your new office. How great is that, right? For a job well done, well, not done.
Ryan: I will, uh, I will do my work, right now. I will stay late tonight.
Ryan: Um, I'm very sorry. About everything.
Jim: You're a good kid. You know what, it gets bigger once you're in there. Enjoy.
Ryan: Is there Internet?
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Jim: I just figured you needed a place where you could concentrate. And not be bothered by... bothering people.
- Permalink: I just figured you needed a place where you could concentrate. A...