Are you a TV Fanatic?
Sign up for our daily newsletter to receive personalized television news for free!
Michael: My lord my liege.
Ryan: Yes, Michael?
- Permalink: My lord my liege. Yes, Michael?
Pam: Hey guys, we're all gonna visit Meredith at lunch. And we're kicking in $5 for flowers.
Kevin: Who's we, you and Jim?
Pam: No, uh, me Stanley and Phyllis so far.
Kevin: Oh, I bet Jim goes too.
Pam: Yeah, I haven't asked him yet.
Kevin: Oh, I bet you ask?
Pam: I was planning on it.
Kevin: I bet you were.
- Permalink: Hey guys, we're all gonna visit Meredith at lunch. And we're kic...
Dwight: It's only Meredith.
Michael: Yeah, it's only Meredith, thank God. But did you see the way they looked at me? Like I was a murderer or something.
Dwight: Hey... Why did you do it?
Michael: It was an accident.
Dwight: Was she talkin' back?
Dwight: Did you get sick of that face? Did she owe you money? Uh-oh. Is this downsizing? Did she spurn your advances?
- Permalink: It's only Meredith. Yeah, it's only Meredith, thank God. But d...
One day Michael came in complaining about a speed bump on the highway. I wonder who he ran over then.Jim
- Permalink: One day Michael came in complaining about a speed bump on the hi...
Pam: Thank God you were there.
Andy: Did you see who did it?
Dwight: No need we can just check the security tapes.
Michael: Gah. Kind of a good news bad news there. I was able to be on the scene so quickly because I was in the car that hit her.
Jim: Who was driving?
Pam: Oh, Michael.
- Permalink: Thank God you were there. Yeah. Did you see who did it? No...
Michael: Ladies and Gentlemen. I have some bad news. Meredith was hit by a car.
Michael: It happened this morning in the parking lot. I took her to the hospital, and the doctors tried to save her life. They did the best that they could... And she is going to be OK.
Stanley: What is wrong with you? Why did you have to phrase it like that?
- Permalink: Ladies and Gentlemen. I have some bad news. Meredith was hit by ...
Kevin: Are you kidding me, Pam and Jim are totally hooking up. All they do is smile; they're just keeping it a secret. Right?
Oscar: I don't know, there is no evidence of intimacy. They've been in remarkably good moods. It could be other things.
Kevin: Are you kidding me?
- Permalink: Are you kidding me, Pam and Jim are totally hooking up. All they...
Jim and I went to dinner a few times when he got back from New York. I talked him through his break up. It's really nice to be good friends again.Pam
- Permalink: Jim and I went to dinner a few times when he got back from New Y...
I broke up with Karen after the job interview, and uh... it was a little awkward when she came back from the city. She told me, very clearly, just because we were broken up didn't mean she was going anywhere, because she worked really hard for her career. But the next day her desk was empty, and as for me and my current romantic life, I uh... I'm single now and looking, so if you know anybody.Jim
- Permalink: I broke up with Karen after the job interview, and uh... it was ...
IT Guy: You know generally it's not a good idea to click on offers that you haven't requested. What was the exact offer?
Pam: It was for a video.
IT Guy: Yeah, what kind of video?
Pam: A celebrity sex tape.
Jim: Really, what kind of celebrity?
Pam: Not relevant.
Jim: How much did you pay for it?
Pam: Not relevant.
Jim: You paid for it?
Pam: It all happened so fast.
- Permalink: You know generally it's not a good idea to click on offers that ...
This is going to be a very good year. Very good. Jan is at home. Jim is back. My protege Ryan is at corporate. Good stuff. Um ... Andy and Dwight are rockin' the sales team. I feel very blessed. [slams Meredith with the car]Michael
- Permalink: This is going to be a very good year. Very good. Jan is at home....
Okay, well I did not get the job in New York, but I got the real prize, domestic bliss. Jan made me breakfast this morning... well she bought the milk. It's soy. [walks into bedroom, Jan sleeping on bed] This is why I do it, that's what I have to come home to. [sighs] She probably won't be up for a few hours.Michael
- Permalink: Okay, well I did not get the job in New York, but I got the real...