The Big Bang Theory

The Big Bang Theory Season 4 Quotes

Season 4 Episode 24: "The Roommate Transmogrification"

Raj: To quote Shakespeare, "It is better to have loved and lost than to stay home every night and download increasingly shameful pornography."
Penny: Oh, you poor baby!
Raj: What's wrong with me, Penny?
Penny: Nothing! Nothing. You know, if we weren't friends - and you hadn't brought up that creepy pornography story - I'd be on you like the speed of light squared on matter to make energy.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Raj: Well, to paraphrase Shakespeare: It's better to have loved and lost than to stay home every night and download increasingly shameful pornography.
Penny: Oh... you poor baby.
Raj: What's wrong with me, Penny?
Penny: Nothing, nothing. You know, if we weren't friends - and you hadn't brought up that creepy pornography story - I'd be on you like the speed of light squared on matter to make energy.
Raj: Hey, you totally got that right. E = MC squared.
Penny: I listen. I have no idea what it means, but I listen.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Penny: Oh, okay, look. THIS. NEVER. HAPPENED. Do you understand me?
Raj: (nodding)
Penny: Really?! Still can't talk to me?!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Leonard: What are you doing here?
Raj: I was sleeping!
Leonard: In MY bed?
Raj: Well, I would have slept in my OWN bed, but it was being used to bring shame to my family....and the memory of Gene Roddenberry!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Amy: Have you considered massage?
Sheldon: I'd like to respond to that sarcastically: Yes, I relish the thought of a stranger covering my body with oil and rubbing it.
Amy: I was proposing you massage your muscles with your OWN hands.
Sheldon: (aback) Still sounds like a lot of unnecessary touching...
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Bernadette: I was head-hunted by a big pharmaceutical company. They're going to pay me a buttload of money!!
Leonard: Bernadette, that's great!! Howard, do YOU make a buttload?
Howard: Better than what YOU got a buttload of!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Bernadette: The thesis committee accepted my doctoral dissertation. I'm getting my Ph.D!!
(the other congratulate her)
Penny: Wow! So that means that....(points around the table to all the Ph.D's) You're a doctor, you're a doctor, you're a doctor, YOU'RE a doctor, and Howard....you know a lot of doctors!!
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Howard: You gotta like this: the girlfriend.....the ex-girlfriend, bonding over your rooty-tooty stinky booty?
(all but Leonard laugh)
Leonard: Kill me!
Sheldon: It wouldn't help. The human body is capable of being flatulent for hours after death.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Sheldon: Here's an interesting fact about alcohol ... Man is not the only species that ferments fruit in order to become intoxicated. Can you guess what the other is? Hint: sometimes they pack the alcohol in their trunks.
Penny: Monkeys
Sheldon: When does a monkey have a trunk?
Penny: When a suitcase just won't do
Much later - Sheldon: And the answer was elephant.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Bernadette to Howard: ....I volunteered for the premature ejaculation project. I mean, it's not like either one of us has heart disease.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Penny: Hey, Sheldon, did you change your Wi-Fi password again?
Sheldon: Yes, it's "Penny, get your own Wi-Fi." No spaces.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Raj: Can I bring girls here?
Leonard: You? Sure. Bring as many as you want.
Raj: Okay, deal.
Leonard: Just not against their will.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Raj: Come on, dude, I'm exhausted and Tyra Banks says the most important item in your makeup bag is a good night's sleep.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Amy: Although it is ... microbiology.
Sheldon: Your doctorate is in neurobiology. I fail to see the distinction.
Amy: I'll make it simple for you. I study the brain, the organ responsible for Beethoven's Fifth Symphony. Bernadette studies yeast, the organism responsible for Michelob Lite.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Leonard: Open the landing bay doors, shuttle craft approaching.
 • Rating: Unrated

Howard: You gotta like this. The girlfriend, the ex-girlfriend bonding over your rooty-tooty stinky booty.
Leonard: Kill me.
Sheldon: It wouldn't help. The human body is capable of being flatulent for hours after death.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 4 Episode 23: "The Engagement Reaction"

Raj: Rotting Zombie ... Sheldon's new Facebook photo!
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Priya: They dressed up in leotards and goggles and called themselves the New Delhi Power Rangers.
Penny: How old were they?
Priya: Not as old as you'd want them to be.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Bernadette: Howard's mother had a heart attack because I have sex with him and she can't!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Wolowitz: Whereas Jewish mothers take a casual la-dee-dah approach to their sons.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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