The Big Bang Theory

The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Quotes

Season 3 Episode 23: "The Lunar Excitation"

Amy: I don't object to the concept of a deity, but I'm baffled by the notion of one that takes attendance
 • Rating: 4.9 / 5.0

Raj: Howard wanted to write "mumbo jumbo," but I said no, our Sheldon would say "hokum."
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Sheldon: That's not afternoon. That's prevening.
 • Rating: 4.9 / 5.0

Leonard: When you say mistake, do you mean a fortunate mistake like the discovery of penicillin?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Sheldon: Hello, Amy Farrah Fowler. I'm sorry to inform you that you've been taken in by unsupportable mathematics designed to prey upon the gullible and the lonely. Additionally, I am being blackmailed with a hidden dirty sock.
Amy: If that was slang, I'm unfamiliar with it. If it was literal, I share your aversion to soiled hosiery.
 • Rating: 4.8 / 5.0

Wolowitz: Okay, what if I were to tell you, tomorrow at 4:30, you could meet a woman who has been scientifically chosen to be your perfect mate?
Sheldon: I would snort with derision and throw my arms in the air, exhausted by your constant tomfoolery.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Sheldon: Incidentally, one can get beaten up in school simply by referring to oneself as one.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Sheldon: Yes, in 1917 when Albert Einstein established the theoretic foundation for the laser in his paper "Zur Quantentheorie der Strahlung," his fondest hope was that the resultant device be bitchin'.
 • Rating: 4.9 / 5.0

Sheldon: As a native Texan, I must say that I've never heard the phrase "yee haw" used in quite that context.
Penny: Oh God.
Sheldon: "Oh God." That I've heard on multiple occasions.
 • Rating: 4.6 / 5.0

Raj: I'm telling you, dude. The only way to feel better about Penny going out with other guys is for you to get back on the whores.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Leonard: Don't worry about the moon. We set our laser to "stun."
 • Rating: 4.8 / 5.0

Sheldon: I should have brought an umbrella.
Leonard: What for? It's not gonna rain.
Sheldon: I know that, but with skin as fair as mine, moon burn is a real possibility.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Season 3 Episode 22: "The Staircase Implementation"

Sheldon: Are you asking me or telling me?
Leonard: Telling you?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Sheldon: That's not an apology; that's simply an acknowledgment that I was right.
Leonard: Okay, I'm sorry.
Sheldon: There you go.
 • Rating: 2.0 / 5.0

Leonard: Is that your dad?
Wolowitz: If she grows any more hair on her face, yes.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Sheldon: I assure you, you'll be sorry you wasted your money on an iPod when Microsoft comes out with theirs.
 • Rating: 3.8 / 5.0

Leonard: What am I doing in your spam folder?
Sheldon: I put you there after you forwarded me a picture of a cat playing the piano entitled, "this is funny."
 • Rating: 4.3 / 5.0

Sheldon: Roommates agree that Friday nights shall be reserved for watching Joss Whedon's brilliant new series, "Firefly."
Leonard: Does that really need to be in the agreement?
Sheldon: Might as well settle it now; it's going to be on for years.
 • Rating: 4.8 / 5.0

Season 3 Episode 21: "The Plimpton Stimulation"

Sheldon: Can I get you something? A feminine hygiene product or a bowel-regulating yogurt?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Sheldon: Dr. Plimpton, Penny is a waitress who doesn't understand the role gasoline plays in the internal combustion engine.
 • Rating: 4.8 / 5.0

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