Why would she keep something from me? I shared my body with that woman. And my Netflix password.

Sheldon

If we're all gonna die, why am I eating so much kale?

Raj

Oh, I don't mind. I'm very good at complaining. If it were an Olympic Sport I'd complain about what a stupid sport it is, and then I'd take home the gold.

Sheldon

I can't believe I'm saying this, but can we watch the news or something?

Penny

Sheldon: Do you know what else I love about you? Your handwriting is impeccable!
Stuart: Thank you for noticing!
Sheldon: I mean it. I mean, it's like you have the soul of a label-maker.

I've been babysitting him way longer than you have.

Raj

Howard: There's a baby in there!
Bernadette: Oh yeah, that's where I put it.

I hope it's not a West Coast party, because according to the man on the radio, a West Coast party don't stop.

Sheldon

You'll have nerds fawning all over you. If you don't love that, this marriage is in trouble.

Leonard

When I see a pretty girl walking down the street, I think "hubba hubba" just like any other guy.

Sheldon

Bernadette: I left my phone downstairs!
Howard: Dammit, so did I!
Bernadette: I have my iPad.
Howard: What are you going to do, email 911?!

When we're sleeping, she breathes on me. One night it got so bad I almost grabbed Toto and headed to the storm cellar.

Sheldon

TBBT Quotes

Raj: Okay, here's another one: if a zombie bites a vampire, and the vampire bites a human, does the human become a vampire or a zombie? Or, a zompire?

Amy: Sheldon, there's something else I've been wanting to say, but before I do, I just... I want you to know that you don't have to say it back.I know you're not ready, and I don't want you to say it just because social convention dictates...
Sheldon: I love you, too.
Amy: You said it.
Sheldon: There's no denying I have feelings for you that can't be explained in any other way. I briefly considered that I had a brain parasite. But that seems even more far-fetched. The only conclusion was love.