Nathan Fillion: How about a guy who looks like Nathan Fillion, but a little more annoyed than Nathan Fillion usually is?
Leonard: What do you think?
Raj: Aww. That's good enough for Facebook.

Penny: I don't want five dollars. I want my dignity.
Amy: So what are we talking about? Ten bucks?

Oh, hey! Did you see that? I figured out how to open my door all by myself. Maybe I'll fling some feces around my cage to celebrate.

Penny

Nathan Fillion: Oh, umm. I think you made a mistake. I'm not an actor.
Raj: Don't say that. You're not Dame Judi Dench but you're pretty great.

Raj: The guy who plays Jon Snow was a jerk and we still watch Game of Thrones.
Leonard: He was a jerk because you rear-ended him.
Raj: I was distracted. It's weird seeing a member of the Night's Watch with kayak strapped to his car.

Are you folding that like a crazy person to get me to do it?

Sheldon

Sheldon: Gee, Penny. Life's given me lemons, what should I do?
Penny: You could shove them somewhere.
Sheldon: Okay, now you're getting creative.

Sheldon: How many Edisons does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Amy: How many?
Sheldon: Who cares he stole the idea and doesn't deserve his own joke.

Amy: Okay, that's enough.
Penny: What? No! I really want to know what happens-- and Bernadette really, really, really wants to know what happens.

Penny reading Amy's book: "Amelia stood before the newly repaired time machine.She regretted giving Cooper the part he needed."
Bernadette: Because she wanted him to give her the part she needed.

Leonard: Stephen Hawking liked our paper. Said the premise is intriguing.
Sheldon: Good to see you again, Mr. Stephen-Hawking- Liked-Our-Paper.
Leonard: And you as well, Mr. Our-Premise-Is-Intriguing.
Howard: How do you do, Mr. I'll- Admit-That's-Pretty-Cool?
Raj: Yeah, you keep setting me up for failure.

Sheldon: Professor Hawking?
Professor Hawking: Oh, brother, you should see the look on your faces.
Leonard: You really didn't like our paper?
Professor Hawking: I like your paper very much. The premise is intriguing.
Sheldon: Then why are you attacking us?
Professor Hawking: If you were sitting in a chair for 40 years, you'd get bored, too. Anyway, got to go. I promised to help the neighbor kid with his math homework. Ciao.

TBBT Quotes

Mrs. Cooper: Shelly! I'm so glad you're here!
Sheldon: I saw you having naked sex.

Penny: I give up, he's impossible
Sheldon: I can't be impossible, I exist. I believe what you meant to say is, "I give up, he's improbable."