Howard: Wipe that smug smile off your face.
Bernadette: I can't.

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If there were a list of things that make me more comfortable, a list would be at the top of that list.

Sheldon

How many grown ups do you know with Mr. Spock oven mitts?

Leonard

Excuse me, no one does a better job at pretending to be a person than I do. Siri comes close, but I know more jokes.

Sheldon

Amy: Some people think the sexiest organ is the brain.
Penny: No one ever bought me drinks at a bar because my brain just popped out of my shirt.

You eat it. You're married. It doesn't matter what you look like.

Sheldon

He's having a rough time. Amy broke his heart. The DVR cut off the last minute of Dr. Who. That crow followed him home.

Leonard

I admire your father's work. It's not every day that I get to meet someone who's life journey began in my hero's scrotum.

Sheldon

This is a documentary about Mr. Spock. I'm sure if there is nudity it will be tasteful.

Sheldon

Raj: Oh, hey! High five!
Sheldon: Absolutely not.

Penny: Does the study say what happens to unpopular kids?
Leonard: You tell me. You woke up in bed with one.

He has glasses, and I'm a know it all. We're not built for prison.

Sheldon

TBBT Quotes

I just gave you my virginity, woman. Cool your jets!

Sheldon

(Singing) Thor and Dr Jones, Thor and Dr. Jones. One plays with lightening, the other plays with bones.

Howard and Raj