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The-big-bang-theory

Leonard's Mom: Leonard, would it make you feel better to hear that your mother approved of your life choices?
Leonard: Yes, it would.
Leonard's Mom: Yeah. Well, you should work on that.

Howie, I love you,and as your wife, your mother is every bit as much my problem as she is yours, so ... I want a divorce.

Bernadette

Raj: Boy, I'm so hungry today. I wonder why?
Howard: Because you had sex the other night?
Raj: You know what? That may be it. By the way, it isn't like riding a bike. Like, I fell off a few times.

Leonard: Penny and I have some big news.
Penny: We're engaged!
Raj: And I thought me having sex with Emily was gonna be the big news.

Welcome to Team Putz.

Howard [to Bernadette]

Penny: Where did you get a ring?
Leonard: I've... had it for a couple years, not important. Penny... will you marry me?
Penny: Oh, my God, yes.
Leonard: This would have been so much more romantic if you didn't have monkey hair on your finger.

Leonard: So, is that it? Are we engaged?
Penny: Yeah, I think so.
Leonard: All right.

Penny: Okay, it may look that way, but getting fired from that movie was the best thing that could have happened to me, okay? I finally realize I don't need to be famous or have some big career to be happy.
Leonard: Then what do you need?
Penny: You, you stupid Pop-Tart!

Penny: We could get married.
Leonard: Come on, be serious.
Penny: I am.
Leonard: Why? Because I'm a-a "smart decision"?
Penny: Well, yeah.
Leonard: So I'm like a bran muffin.

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