You eat it. You're married. It doesn't matter what you look like.


He's having a rough time. Amy broke his heart. The DVR cut off the last minute of Dr. Who. That crow followed him home.


I admire your father's work. It's not every day that I get to meet someone who's life journey began in my hero's scrotum.


This is a documentary about Mr. Spock. I'm sure if there is nudity it will be tasteful.


Raj: Oh, hey! High five!
Sheldon: Absolutely not.

Penny: Does the study say what happens to unpopular kids?
Leonard: You tell me. You woke up in bed with one.

He has glasses, and I'm a know it all. We're not built for prison.


Sheldon: How do we know you're not going to take the money and drive away?
Leonard: Whatcha doing, Skippy?
Sheldon: Exactly what 1970s crima dramas have taught us.

Howard: What was wrong with that guy?
Raj: Um, he's Indian. We've already got one of those.

Bernadette: You know who went on a date the other night? Stewart.
Penny: Oh, good for him.
Bernadette: I thought so too.
Penny: So is she like, homeless or framing him for a crime?

Raj: Why do you need Kripke? Can't you just go to Party City for helium?
Leonard: We'd have to go to every Party City in California.
Howard: Sounds like you on Cinco de Mayo.
Raj: Hey, people were still talking about that party on Siete de Mayo.

Kripke: In fencing, we don't call it a stab. We call it a touch.
Sheldon: Yes, I'm aware. But if I say I want to touch one of my friends, I'll get called into human resources.

TBBT Quotes

Amy, I excel at many things, but getting over you wasn't one of them.


(Singing) Thor and Dr Jones, Thor and Dr. Jones. One plays with lightening, the other plays with bones.

Howard and Raj