Penny: Now is that a smart thing to say on a holiday that's basically national sex night?
Leonard: I'm sorry. You're pretty. I'm stupid.

Penny: That's crazy. We have reservations.
Leonard: I know.
Penny: So what did you say?
Leonard: Thanks, sorry to bother you. But I said it like a badass.

You know, once I ordered an Uber by accident. I just got in it and went somewhere.

Sheldon

I just gave you my virginity, woman. Cool your jets!

Sheldon

Meemaw: No wine for me. Sheldon's bringing me my whiskey.
Sheldon: There you go, Meemaw. I made it just how you like it. A lot, in a glass.

There's Amy! I just know you're going to hit it off. You both have the same fashion sense.

Sheldon

Oh, now you call her Constance. I call her Meemaw. You have your own Meemaw. It's not my fault she died when you were four.

Sheldon

Penny: You know, the last time I got a handwritten letter was from someone who told me I parked like a blind person.
Leonard: That someone has a name.
Sheldon: Thank you.

Sheldon: Sounds like it's time for the Sheldon Cooper apology tour!
Leonard: Oh, I hope it's as much fun as the Sheldon Cooper spell checks local menus tour.

Good, now try it as if this wasn't your first day as a person.

Amy

Why don't you tell me what happened, and in a gentle and loving way, I'll explain to you why you're wrong.

Amy

I hope laughter is the best medicine because this care package is a joke.

Sheldon

TBBT Quotes

James Earl Jones: Why don't you and your friends come to Comic-Con with me?
Sheldon: Really?
James Earl Jones: Of course. And San Diego is right across the border from my favorite city on Earth, Tijuana.... where I'm taking you every night!
Sheldon: Ay-yi-yi.
James Earl Jones: Ay-yi-yi. Bang. Bang.

Sheldon: Why do you have the Chinese character for "soup" tattooed on your right buttock?
Penny: It's not "soup," it's "courage."
Sheldon: No it isn't. But I suppose it does take courage to demonstrate that kind of commitment to soup.
Penny: How'd you see it? You said you wouldn't look.
Sheldon: Sorry. As I told you, the hero always peeks.