Well, that's some salty language. May I remind you that you're the president of a major university, not president of the Potty Mouth Club. There it is again. Do you kiss your mother with that mouth? Oh, I'm sorry for your loss. Good night, sir.

Sheldon

Howard: Meanwhile, you still don't have a car.
Sheldon: Don't try to change the subject. This is about a parking space. It has nothing to do with cars.

Raj: Mummies and zombies are the exact same thing.
Leonard: Oh yeah. Mummies are wrapped in bandages.
Raj: That's called a fashion choice.

The Big Bang Theory Season 6 Episode 9 Quotes

Raj: Okay, here's another one: if a zombie bites a vampire, and the vampire bites a human, does the human become a vampire or a zombie? Or, a zompire?

Sheldon: Lipid residue. An anal autograph. A colon calling card, if you will.
Cleaner: Tuesday okay?