Does it get any funnier than The Big Bang Theory quotes? There's a reason why this is the highest rated sitcom on television. And that has a lot to do with these Big Bang Theory quotes.

I'm mapping basic topics of conversation and with whom they can be discussed. I've called these circles zones of privacy. Don't google that unless you want to see pictures of people's genitals.

Sheldon

Dr. Koothrappali: You're an adult who can't get by without an allowance from his parents. Women don't want that.
Raj: What are you saying? That you're giving up on me? What kind of father gives up on his son?
Dr. Koothrappali: I have six children, five of whom are married and self sufficient. I don't think I'm the problem.

I really envy your relationship. Other than you two only having sex once a year, you're the perfect couple.

Bert

Amy: Our first date was at a coffee shop.
Sheldon: Although unlike you're date, she actually showed up. [pause] Oh, he looks sad again.

Stuart, don't you drink my milk!

Bernadette

Leonard, in the world of theoretical physics, you never finish. So much is unprovable. But when I was studying that railway guide, it was so tangible and so satisfying that something just clicked. Then it clacked. Then it clicked, then it clacked. Click, clack, and clickity clack, and here we are, woo woo!

Sheldon

Howard: How'd you even get that up the stairs?
Sheldon: I said to myself, I think I can, I think I can. And then I couldn't.

Penny: Alright, you guys ready to get crazy?
Amy: Well, the bra under here ain't beige.

Amy: Is there anything we can do?
Bernadette: Sure. Open up a college fund, shop for life insurance, and in the laundry room there's a mountain of dirty laundry. Wash it or burn it. Your choice.

This doesn't happen very often, but here comes a hug. [pause] Oh dear, I have to tinkle again.

Sheldon

Leonard: So, you're gonna throw me under the bus?
Penny: I'm gonna throw you so hard, I'll probably win a stuffed animal.

Penny: How is this any different than you making me live with Sheldon?!
Sheldon: Hey, I shared my Honey Nut Cheerios with you!

Our section of The Big Bang Theory quotes covers pretty much everything Penny, Leonard, Sheldon and company has ever said. We review this sitcom on a weekly basis and we update our rundown of The Big Bang Theory quotes accordingly. You can - nay, you should! - review these one-liners and quotes on a weekly basis in order to stay current and in order to laugh. You do want to laugh, don't you? Good. We thought so. That's why we pride ourselves on being the top sources for The Bang Theory quotes on the entire World Wide Web.

TBBT Quotes

Given that St. Valentine was a 3rd century Roman priest who was stoned and beheaded, wouldn't a more appropriate celebration of the evening be taking one's steady gal to witness a brutal murder?

Sheldon

Sheldon: Why do you have the Chinese character for "soup" tattooed on your right buttock?
Penny: It's not "soup," it's "courage."
Sheldon: No it isn't. But I suppose it does take courage to demonstrate that kind of commitment to soup.
Penny: How'd you see it? You said you wouldn't look.
Sheldon: Sorry. As I told you, the hero always peeks.