The Big Bang Theory Quotes
Does it get any funnier than The Big Bang Theory quotes? There's a reason why this is the highest rated sitcom on television. And that has a lot to do with these Big Bang Theory quotes.
Penny: Sheldon, we are just people. we talk about the same things you guys talk about.
Sheldon: You talk about if werewolves can swim?
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Sheldon: I don't want to tell you how to do your job, but when a mouse completes a maze it gets a food pellet.
Amy: It also gets its brain plucked out with tweezers.
Sheldon: And its last meal was a food pellet? You're a monster.
- Permalink: And its last meal was a food pellet? You're a monster.
I love him, but if he's broken, let's not get a new one.Penny
- Permalink: I love him, but if he's broken, let's not get a new one.
Sheldon: Nothing more fun than a paradigm shifting evening of science.
Penny: (to Leonard) And you thought it was soaping me up in the shower.
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Do you realize I don't live with the woman I love because of you?Leonard
- Permalink: Do you realize i don't live with the woman I love because of you?
Sheldon: There were plenty of ways to pass the time before smartphones were invented.
Leonard: That's true.
Sheldon: I'll look them up... Oh, son of a biscuit!
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What kind of scientist are you? everyone knows you've gotta make two out of three!Raj
Raj: No, I'm not okay. I feel like I'm going to jump out of my skin.
Bernadette: I told you not to wax down there.
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Leonard: Hang on. Why do we have to hate it?
Penny: Three words. Dr. Who Convention.
- Permalink: Three words. Dr. Who Convention.
Penny: Oh, I know. We could go horseback riding.
Amy: Actually I can't. My hips don't open wider than 22 degrees. I rode a very thin pony once. On the first bump I just pssshh, popped right off.
Howard: Why do you keep assuming it was me?
Leonard: Because you do this kind of thing all the time, and then you try to cover it up.
Howard: Like when?
Leonard: What about when you flipped the Mars Rover, or lost Koothrappali's dog, or almost drove off with that baby?
Howard: Again, it looked like my car, and the baby didn't even cry until his mother punched me with her keys.
Amy: Well, you got me something. Here.
Amy: They're your Meemaw's Christmas cookies. I called and got
Sheldon: They're perfect. It tastes like her hugs.
Amy: Merry Christmas, Sheldon.
Sheldon: I can't believe this. You're happy, I'm happy. Well, maybe a holiday that's all about giving isn't so...Get your hand out of that box!
Penny: Here's a question-- as an alien pretending to be human, are you planning to engage in any post-prom mating rituals with Amy?
Sheldon: There are post-prom mating rituals?
Penny: Not always. Unless your date drives a van with an air mattress, then always.
Sheldon: Well, if it's part of the prom experience, then I'm open to it.
Penny: You're kidding.
Sheldon: I may be an alien, but I have urges.If Amy wants to copulate by firing her eggs into space, well, then, I will happily catch them with the reproductive sac on my upper flermin. I'm not the best at reading facial cues, but I can see that you're a little turned on.
Penny, there's only one cookie with something in the middle that solves life's problems, and that's an Oreo. Or a Nutter Butter, if you're in a pinch.Sheldon