Dex: Hey, um, you remember that hit and run case from last year, Dalia Montgomery.
Hoffman: My case the one we talked about two days ago? I don't have Alzheimer's.

Scott: You should get a tattoo, it's cathartic, the pain. It's classy.
Dex: Yeah, and then you're walking around with a memory of a corpse etched on your body, I mean forever.
Scott: It's gonna be there, no matter if you can see it or not.

Dex: I love a story with a happy ending.
Tookie: No, Dex, a happy beginning.

It's your wedding day, Jenna. If you want a convict cake, I'll get you a convict cake.


Grey: Hey Dex, how about if I redecorated your house while you weren't home?
Dex: Could you please? I'm so sick of my parents' old furniture.
Grey: Okay, what if I traded in your car.
Dex: How dare you. That mustang is the soul of this whole operation.

I hope that covers your charade's lessons. I think you're playing it all wrong.


Sue Lynn: Thank Dex. I owe her.
Grey: I think we all do.

Violet: You wanna know something kind of cheesy but completely honest.
Dex: Sure.
Violet: I feel like I could float away right now.
Dex: Really cheesy. I feel the same way.

What, are we role playing now?


You almost had the golden ticket of hanging out with me. That's gone.


Bryce: You're a spy.
Dex: Private Investigator. Man, I wish I was a spy. That would be pretty cool, huh?

Remember, never apologize for being a strong single woman with your own money, you own life, your own business, your own good time because you're going to encounter a lot of people who are threatened by it and they're going to try to take it away from you just to feel bigger.


Stumptown Quotes

Ansel: I wanted to see how much you lost.
Dex: Punk.

  • Permalink: Punk.
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Dex: Well you know what they say in Pashto, he who spreads his own goat dung is bound to step in it.
Guy: Pash-
Dex: To. Yeah, it’s what they speak in the stan.
Guy: Yeah.
Dex: Yeah anyone who actually served there would know that. Your dog tags don’t match the name on your credit card and nothing about your car keys says rental, so I’m guessing you’re not in from out of town either. I know you asked if I was from around here figuring we could go back to my place probably ‘cause there’s a woman back at yours.
Guy: Uh.
Dex: Hesitation, it’s when your body says yes before your mouth can say no, i.e., until you get your lies straight. I’m pretty sure only one of us is getting lucky tonight.