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South-park

I just needed help going to sleep... mode.

Shake Weight

You gonna deglaze that f**king pan? I'd deglaze the f**k out of that pan.

Randy

Well, hearing you bitch about your dad is super interesting, Stan. I hope you do it all lunch period.

Cartman

Shake Weight, you're not really work out equipment, are you?

Sharon

Your work out is finished. Here is some cab fare. Now going to sleep mode.

Shake Weight

Passengers said the Carnival Cruise line smelled like poop, but that was an improvement.

TV Announcer

Cartman (as The Coon): I'm making the world a better place.
Kenny (as Mysterion): For you! A better place for you!
Cartman (as The Coon): That's what superheroes do!

He promised everything would change if we worshiped him, but we're still sitting here smoking cigarettes like before. It's like Obama all over again.

Goth Kid

How is it that Mint and Berry came together delivering full flavor and intense crunch?

Mint Berry Crunch

Even Cthulhu knows what evil assholes Stan and Kyle and those guys are and that they are m, uncaring vagina-faces.

Cartman (as The Coon)

Stan: Dude you're freaking out Mint Berry Crunch, he's just peed his pants.
Mint Berry Crunch: No, no, Mint Berry Crunch doesn't ever pee his pants!

Should I admit I was wrong, ask for everyone's forgiveness and go back to my original team? Nah, screw that, I'm just gonna keep being a dick.

Cartman (as Coon)
Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 87 in total

South Park Season 14 Quotes

Does a bear crap in the woods and does the Pope crap on the dreams of 200 deaf boys?

Cartman

Kyle: Wow, I didn't know Golf games were this cool.
Cartman: Yeah dude, EA Sports outdid themselves this time.

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