Fiona: What can you give me for $500 or less?
Funeral Director: A cardboard refrigerator box and a gallon of gasoline in our parking lot out back.
Fiona: I'll take that one.
Funeral Director: No love lost, huh?
Fiona: It was an eventful childhood.

Funeral Director: Have you had a chance to consider what sort of arrangements you'd like to make for your loved one?
Fiona: Yeah, how do we get her into the ground as soon as possible?

Debbie: What the hell is going on, Frank?
Frank: Your mother told me she had something valuable for you kids, but that it might be dangerous to retrieve it.
Carl: How dangerous?
Debbie: On a scale of one to ten?
Frank: Said the DEA could be involved.

This is not a dictatorship. This is America. Give me liberty, or give me meth.

Frank

This place is a shit hole.

Etta

Ian: No, you gotta... it's the other-
Mickey: Do I tell you about EMT shit? Leave the god damn stealing to the experts.

Fiona: Get out of my kitchen!
Lip: My sentiments exactly.

Frank: All I had to do was pull out and you would have never been born.
Fiona: You were too high to pull out.

As long as it's under a dollar, they don't care what we charge them.

Debbie

Waitress: Your boy is in bad shape.
Sierra: He's not my boy.

Liam: I'm doing CPT.
Fiona: CPT?
Liam: Coloured people time.

If you want to piss away every single chance that comes your way, that's your problem, but don't drag me into it.

Fiona

Shameless Quotes

When you're poor, the only way to make money is to steal it or scam it.

Lip

Ian: Hey Fiona? I'm gay.
Fiona: I know.