Jughead: Wow, Betty...Mrs. Cooper. You look incredible.
Alice: Tell me about it. Unfortunately, I couldn’t convince this one to dress appropriately. Tall Guy, get me...
Tall Guy: Tequila, straight up, hold the worm.
Veronica: What was he doing here?
Hermione: The shadow of The Black Hood has finally landed on our home. We received a letter.
Veronica: What? What did it say?!
Hiram: The usual, that we’ll be targeted and punished for our sinful ways.
Veronica: Well, don’t let it ruin your day.
Hermione: According to Keller, apparently dozens of other households have received the exact same letter.
Veronica: Well, I don’t know about those other people, but we’re actually sinners.
Archie: Ronnie! What I said it doesn’t matter if you don’t want to say it back to me.
Veronica: But it does, and it should. And, for whatever messed up reason, Archie, whatever deep seeded issues I have, I can’t let myself go there with you. Sorry. I’m so sorry.
[She gets in the car and leaves]
Betty: How many times, Jug? How many times are we gonna push each other away?
[She tears up]
Jughead: Until it sticks. That was my dad’s one chance of going straight and I wrecked it! I’m not going to destroy you too.
Betty: Just tell me what happened, Jug. Jug!
Betty: Don’t leave, please.
Jughead: Go home.
[He walks away]
[Each reading from The Black Hood’s letter]
Sheriff Keller: People of Riverdale, I have rid this town of the drug-dealing child killer and others like him.
Cheryl: Now you must choose your fate. The next 48 hours will be a test and I will be watching you very closely.
Archie: Show me you are pure of heart and my work ends. Continue to sin...and I will take out the sword again.
Josie: Hey, what’s up?
Valerie: Is it true you’re ditching us?
Josie: Who told you that?
Melody: Someone put a note in my locker.
Valerie: Josie, women are supposed treat each other better than this. We’re your sisters and you clawed us in the back.
Josie: It’s not as black and white as that. Okay, this opportunity just fell into my lap.
Valerie: Then why didn’t talk to us? Why be all shady and hide it?
Melody: Because she wants to try it as a solo diva. Well go ahead, Josie! Try it girl. Cause you’re on your own now.
Josie: What?! No! Val!
[They walk away]
Melody: Pride cometh before the fall, Josie.
Jughead: What the hell game where you playing, Penny?! You lied to me. My dad’s fine.
Penny: I incentivized you.
Jughead: No, you said this was going to be a one and done.
Penny: It’s not like you have a choice.
[She shows him the blackmail footage]
Jughead: What is it?
Penny: It’s insurance you do what I say. And if you cause a stink, or try to back out, or raise your voice to me ever again, I will make sure that video goes straight to the Sheriff’s office. God, I imagine what that’ll do to your dad’s heart. Break it, right?
Jughead: Why...why me?
Penny: FP made me a promise that he didn’t keep. And as far as I’m concerned, his debt is yours. And I’m just getting started with you.
Betty: Veronica, I have a theory...about Sheriff Keller.
Veronica: Oh, me too. It’s obvious.
[Both speak at the same time]
Betty: He’s The Black Hood.
Veronica: He’s having an affair.
[Veronica looks at Betty confused]
Veronica: What?! Is that a joke?
Betty: I wish it were.
Veronica: Whatever crazy web you’re spinning, B. Let me break it down for you. Sheriff Keller’s wife is away, he’s failing at his job. He’s looking for comfort, sneaking around. All signs point to cheating.
Betty: Well, I don’t know. Maybe he’s having an affair and he’s The Black Hood?
Betty: Have you ever heard of the ‘Sugar Man’?
Cheryl: Yeah, of course.
Cheryl: As children, Mother told us tales of how Daddy was friends with this so called ‘Sugar Man.’ And if we were bad, he would sneak into our rooms at night, steal us from our beds and whisk us away, never more to be seen.
Archie: Jughead, calm down.
Jughead: Calm down?! Archie...Riverdale just became a police state.
Archie: Mayor McCoy says the Serpents are the ones dealing jingle jangle.
Jughead: Serpents don’t deal that stuff. The Ghoulies do.
Archie: So tell Mayor McCoy that.
Jughead: Oh, Mayor McCoy...Mayor McCoy just arrested my friends for no reason.
Archie: I called Keller!
Jughead: What the hell, Archie?! Did Betty tell you about this too?
Archie: No, this was my idea. To get rid of the Ghoulies and it worked. They get arrested for street racing and now they’re up to Chestport.
Jughead: For how long? One month? Three months?! You know what they’re going to want on the other side, Archie? Your head...on a stake! All of ours.
Hermione: The St. Clairs had a car accident. They were run off the road. Nick...he will recover. It will take several months.
Veronica: Oh well. Karma’s a bitch.
[Hiram moves his Chess piece]