Thursdays 8:30 PM on NBC
Parks-and-recreation

This question comes from Twitter, because apparently that's something which happens now.

Gwen

I want to tell you about my idea for assault rifle vending machines.

Fester Trim

Nothing gets me more amped than Sarah Machlachlan.

Leslie

Donor: So you do a lot of investing?
Andy: We dabble. I recently invested in some shirts at a garage sale. Left those at a Wendy's, on the way home, so... the economy.

Ben: Hypothetical crisis: Leslie just tried to answer a question, but audibly farted and then threw up. Spin.
Chris: Leslie Knope is literally overflowing with ideas for this town. And speaking about methane, have you heard about her plan to limit greenhouse gas emissions?

Tom: What do you know? You don't care about things.
April: Yes I do. I care about Andy and Champion ... and I want Leslie to win. And I like sleeping.

If I had to have anybody tell me that I have cancer, I would want it to be me.

Chris

Jennifer: I swear the air in this town is killing my brain cells."
Leslie: The water isn't good for you either, you shouldn't drink the tap water.

Donna: A lot of these dogs have rescued people from burning buildings. This one helped Ray Charles around.
Andy: What? This cat was in Boogie Nights?

Displaying quotes 19 - 27 of 182 in total