Parks and Recreation

Thursdays 8:30 PM on NBC
Parks and recreation

"It's like if you could have a Xbox pancake."

Andy

"The dentist pulled the tooth out yesterday but it's always a good idea to demonstrate to your coworkers that you are capable of withstanding a tremendous amount of pain. Plus, it's always fun to see Tom faint."

Ron

This brook won't stop babbling. Shut up!

April

What the fuck is a German muffin?!?

Ron

Ben: I'm just gonna sleep on the floor.
Ron: It's called the "ground" when it's outside.

That's the second most awkward way someone has grabbed my breast.

Leslie

It's like yoga, except I still get to kill something.

Ron [on fishing]

You only get one chance to make a second impression.

Leslie

Andy: I do love you.
April: You do?
Andy: Yea.. that's what, you know, makes the sauce so awesome.

All of you be quiet. Andy, she's mad because you said "awesome sauce" instead of "I love you too." April, he loves you. Stop being a child. Tom, you're clearly at fault here. Blaming Jerry won't save you. Jerry, we both know you were shotgunning funnel cakes instead of watching Lil Sebastian. So everyone apologize to everyone else.

Ron

Jerry, can you please be quiet? I can't hear myself not talking to Andy.

April

I'm not mad at Andy. Andy's great. I awesome sauce Andy.

April
Displaying quotes 85 - 96 of 259 in total

Parks and Recreation Season 3 Quotes

I'm going to type every word I know! Rectangle. America. Megaphone. Monday. Butthole.

Ron

I have cried twice in my life. Once when I was seven and I was hit by a school bus. And then again when I heard that Li'l Sebastian had passed.

Ron
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