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Ben: Show me Pelosi again.

Leslie: Okay, lay down.

Hello Leslie, how long have you been sleeping with Ben?


I made my money the old fashioned way. Getting run over by a Lexus.


When life gives you lemons make lemonade. I read that one on a can of lemonade. I like to think it applies to life.


Chris, you have come up with a plan so spectacularly horrible that it might ruin the entire department.


[To Leslie] Your Mom, kind of made a pass at me.


This spaceship keyboard is driving me crazy. I'm down to one word a minute and the word is perflipiskop. Because I can't fly spaceships.


Leslie: When I first met you I thought you were a fascist hard ass.

Ben: What?

Ben: Should we talk about how you claimed your mom was a Filipino woman you've never met.

Leslie: Should we?

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