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Parks-and-recreation

It's like yoga, except I still get to kill something.

Ron [on fishing]

You only get one chance to make a second impression.

Leslie

Andy: I do love you.
April: You do?
Andy: Yea.. that's what, you know, makes the sauce so awesome.

All of you be quiet. Andy, she's mad because you said "awesome sauce" instead of "I love you too." April, he loves you. Stop being a child. Tom, you're clearly at fault here. Blaming Jerry won't save you. Jerry, we both know you were shotgunning funnel cakes instead of watching Lil Sebastian. So everyone apologize to everyone else.

Ron

Jerry, can you please be quiet? I can't hear myself not talking to Andy.

April

I'm not mad at Andy. Andy's great. I awesome sauce Andy.

April

Hey, are you alright? You seem super not happy.

Andy

Andy: God, I swear.. it's almost like they don't want you to win.
April: Well, you better practice. You gotta win me a teddy bear.
Andy: I'm gonna win you a million teddy bears.
April: Well, I want a billion teddy bears.
Andy: Well, that's a little unrealistic. This is a hard game.. Two million.

Tom: Hold on a second. Did you get your breasts done? You look amazing!
Joan: Yes, thanks for noticing.
Tom: Joan, listen to me. This harvest festival, it's gonna knock your socks off and when it does, I'm gonna be there to give you a foot massage. To completion.
Ben: Good lord!

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