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Parks-and-recreation

Ann: Do you think anybody's going to show up?
Leslie: A) Yes. B) Even if they don't, we'll just put the concert on ourselves. But C) Yes, yes. They're definitely going to show up. Although D) Maybe not.

Pawnee's kids are less important than poop tubes.

Leslie

The only guy that I care about right now is six feet tall with wild crazy hair and a ukulele that doubles as a water gun. Freddy Spaghetti.

Leslie

Less man time, more Ann time.

Leslie

Don't make it last very long. Ladies don't like that.

Leslie

Leslie: Is this a bad time?
Tom: Lucy's here, I'm in my sexy pajamas. I just took four Benadryls to dull my sensitivity. Yes.
Leslie: You're about to have sex.
Tom: Why else would Boyz II Men's "On Bended Knee" be playing right now.

Recently I have been thinking about maybe leaving this job, but I felt like I needed a sign. And then Ann broke up with me the week I was going to propose, the government got shut down and yesterday one of those pigeons took an [expletive] on me. And I was indoors, so...

Mark

Mark: You know, not everyone has your enthusiasm for this work.
Leslie: You know, I guess I've been mispronouncing your name all these years, Mark Brendana-quits.

Traditionally, when I end a long-term relationship, I'm a little fragile, and I have a tendency to do some reckless things. So I need to stay away from Chris.

Ann
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