Ron: You mean I've had a toy on my desk all this time?
Leslie: You mean you thought you had a REAL landmine on your desk??

Ron: I have my rights as a US citizen to blow a hole in that f*cking door and get out! It's in the constitution!
Leslie: There's no swearing in the constitution.

Ron: That's not the whole story.
Leslie: What does that mean?
Ron: It means what it means. That is not the whole story of why I left.

Leslie: Come on Ron, we were friends for 10 years.
Ron: We were work proximity associates.

Ron: WHAT IF WE HAVE AN EMERGENCY AND HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE?
Leslie: I DID NOT CONSIDER THAT POSSIBILITY!

I would rather bleed out than sit here and talk about my feelings for 10 mins.

Ron

I'm going to break out of here, then I'm going to snap you in half.

Ron

Leslie: You're the most unreasonable person I've ever meet and I'm not going to change my mind no matter what anyone says.
Ron: You're bad at scrapbooking.
Leslie: Whaa--?

  • Permalink: Whaa--?
  • Added:

Did you hear a word I said?! No you didn't! Because I'm a ghost!

Ben

Leslie: That was all flash no substance!
Ron: It was exactly as substantive as your presentation.

They're talking about this ball!

Leslie

This is a competition. We need to win it. Please do your jobs.

Ron

Parks & Rec Quotes

Zerts are what I call deserts, tray trays are what I call entrees, sandwiches are sammies, sandoozles or Adam Sandlers, air conditioners are cool blaterz with a "z" ... I don't know where that came from. I call cakes big ol' cookies, I call noodles long ass rice, fried chicken is fry fry chicky chick, chicken parmesan is chicky chicky parm parm, chicken caciatore is chicky catch, I call eggs pre-birds or future birds, root beer is super water, tortillas are bean blankets, and I call forks... food rakes!

Tom

Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge, let’s go!

April