Thursdays 8:30 PM on NBC
Parks-and-recreation

A straightforward deal! Why didn’t you tell me? I don’t have my straightforward deal fedora on me! We gotta stop at my storage unit!

Tom

Ron: Spending the day outside alone sounds like a dream. I love being a father, but there are a few things I miss: silence, the absence of noise, one single moment undisturbed by a children’s tv program called Doc McStuffins.

Leslie: What’s your favorite TV show?
Donna: For live tweeting it’s Scandal, for binge watching, it’s Scandal. And for fashion? Scandal. My favorite TV show is Scandal.

Leslie: Now is lady time.
April: You sound like a tampon commercial.

Leslie: What’s the 411? Who you crushin’ on these days?
April: Ew, my husband, weirdo.

The only thing I’m crazy about is a magnificent pregnant manta ray named Ann Perkins.

Leslie

I once forgot to brush my teeth for five weeks. I didn’t actually sell my last car. I just forgot where I parked it. I don’t know who Al Gore is and now I’m afraid to ask.

Andy

You are like the saxophone player for the California Raisons good!

Andy

On nights like this when the cold winds blow, the air is awash in the swirling eddies of our dream, come with me and find safe haven in a warm bathtub full of my jazz.

Duke Silver
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