Jean-Ralphio, although I truly hope that I never see you again, I do wish you a long and happy life.

Leslie

Ben: I have so many presents, it's weird!
Andy: Yes!! Oh, for the baby? Put 'em over there.

April: But in the end? Bringing a child into this world? That's disgusting!
Andy: Nooo, we'd wipe all the disgusting stuff right off it!

Babe, I want to put a babe in you babe.

Andy

Andy: I get to push the buttons! I call it!
April: He called it.
Leslie: Yeah I know.

All that coffee and legal marijuana has people wanting to buy houses quickly, and irrationally.

Donna

Haha, "Euro-trash," I like that. That is indeed a garbage continent.

Ron

Leslie: Why are you like this?
Jean-Ralphio: Pills, baby!

I'm gonna turn the "mayoral office" into "my oral office."

The Douche

Lucy, your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to marry me.

Tom

His barber, butcher, and lover. I have lost one of them today.

Ron

Oh, people grieve in different ways.

Leslie

Parks & Rec Quotes

I hit rock bottom that night. I mean I literally fell to the bottom of a pit and hit a rock. I remember laying there thinking, there's probably a good reason why I'm down here. And then I remember thinking I need morphine.

Mark

You know why tonight is so much fun? Because everyone's so gay. And they know how to have fun, and the dancing ... everyone is just who they are and who they are is just stone cold gay.

Leslie