Ron: Take this compass. All great adventurers need one.
Leslie: As far as all this firing stuff goes...I will not forget and I will never forgive you.

Wow, sounds like you're going some tough stuff right now. Too bad there's not doctors for your mind.

Andy

Townsperson: I think we should tax all bad thing. Like racism and women's vaginas.
Ann: We're not taxing any genitals.
Townsperson: Then what are we doing here? Come on, boys.

The 'zero' refers to the amount of water in Water Zero. If you want less calories, try Diet Water Zero Lite. It only has 60 calories.

Kathryn

I'll never be a cop! I'll have to be a robber...

Andy

Number one is being able to run 2 miles in under 25 minutes. That's a typo right? That's not humanly possible.

Andy

They call me Devo because I can whip 'em good.

Ben

Ron: I went to Paunch Burger and got a number two: Double Bacon Grenade Deluxe with hash browns, chili cheese fries, and one poached egg.
Ann: Ugh, number two is right.

What did you put in this sugar? It's so good!

Leslie

April, Here's something to remind you of our 3 -legged dog chapion. Also, you are way better at laundry. Can you please do mine and send it back to me? Thanks, Mouse Rat rules! Love, Andy. P.S. Please hurry. I've been wearing a bandana for underwear for 3 days now.

April [reading Andy's letter]

Parks and Recreation Season 5 Episode 2 Quotes

What did you put in this sugar? It's so good!

Leslie

April, Here's something to remind you of our 3 -legged dog chapion. Also, you are way better at laundry. Can you please do mine and send it back to me? Thanks, Mouse Rat rules! Love, Andy. P.S. Please hurry. I've been wearing a bandana for underwear for 3 days now.

April [reading Andy's letter]