Joel: Okay, ya know what? That's my wife. Don't talk to her that way.
Victor: Whatever. She didn't even get arrested.

Kristina: Honey, how old were you when you got your first boner?
Adam: What?
Kristina: You know, stiffy, hard on, chubby, old were you when you first got wood?
Adam: What the hell? Is it even six o'clock yet?

Hi grandpa, I have pubic hair.


My real mom got me Burger King every day.


Honey, you're so awesome. I'm sorry I'm such a tease. You got all oiled up and you have you're Merv Griffin jacket.


That's great honey. I really hope she feels like she's on a cruise ship so she doesn't want to leave.


If you'll have me, I would like to go out on a date with you.


Look. I love your mom. I do. But she cannot move in with us! she's going to take over. She's going to have prayer circles and crucifixes everywhere...


Adam: What about Max?
Kristina: Max thinks it's cool. He thinks I look like Bane from the Batman movie.

These were 'butter me up' pancakes, weren't they?


Mark is so cute, but he's like a puppy. Hank is a man!


You're not horrible, that's what I came to say. You're incredible. Good night.


Parenthood Season 4 Quotes

We think it's just better if you let us handle the big questions with Jabar.


And now, take your shirt off!