Maria: I would never leave my husband. I was raised Catholic, Agent Gibbs. My marriage was sacred.
Gibbs: You've got a funny way of showing it.

Gibbs: You know, there's a small percentage of people who can't eat anything processed red. Allergies. Gives them rashes, Meredith. Like that rash you have right there, Meredith. You must have touched something red recently, huh? Like a vial of red liquid cocaine? Found those inside the PPAs your divers positioned on the ocean floor. There's 200 of them. That's a whole lot of drug money.
Grossman: It's inadmissible garbage. Doesn't make any sense. Where would Meredith get narcotics like that?
Gibbs: She didn't. She had a partner, who's being arrested as we speak. In 2010, you represented the Suarez Cartel. Their signature product was liquid cocaine. Last month you had a meeting in Cartagena. We've been tracking your pre-positioned asset. Last night it was called to the surface and loaded onto a Columbian trailer. The DEA raided it.
Meredith: You dumb ass!
Grossman: Shut up, Merry.
Gibbs: No, Jerry. You shut up.

I'm confused. Are you having trouble building a case against me? Do you need the Navy's help?

Katz

Dacey: My night crew won't be in for a few hours, but you guys are welcome to stick around. Actually, it's 90s night, in case you guys want to re-live some of your glory days later.
McGee: Excuse me?
Tony: Glory days?
Dacey: Yeah. Show off some of those old dance moves. Little "Can't Touch This."

Adam: I never have pegged you for the type, Ellie.
Bishop: The type?
Adam: Ah, you know. Trade in your stats and your snacks for a badge and a gun.

Tony: We were hoping, Tiffany, that you could...
Tiffany: Trace this to a particular buyer.
Tony: Good guess!
Tiffany: You're cops. This is evidence. Duh.

Palmer: It goes without saying but, this kind of stuff effects me a lot more since become a father.
Bishop: I'm sure it does.
Palmer: I mean with this kind of evil in the world.... People who will do this kind of...How am I supposed to let Victoria leave the house.
Bishop: Pretty sure she'll leave the house eventually, whether you let her or not.

McGee: You and Zoe broke up?
Tony: You heard.
McGee: Why didn't you tell me?
Tony: Well the break-up bug's going around. Didn't want you to catch it.

Bishop: We're about to go live. What are you guys talking about?
McGee and Tony: Star Wars.

Sonja: Tony DiNozzo. Why does your name ring a bell?
Tony: I'm kind of a legend in the NCIS world.
Sonja: I don't know anything about that. I transferred from ATF.
Tony: ATF? Ever work with Zoe Keates?
Sonja: Yeah. Training exercises in Georgia. You two are dating!
Tony: Ah. Well that's over now.
Sonja: Well I hope for your sake she ended it, cause that girl was mean on the jujitsu mat.
Tony: I miss that.

Vance: I'm thinking it's time we bring Tony Stark in for questioning.
Gibbs: [blank look]
Vance: Iron Man. Smug. Tech mogul slash super hero. My son collects them.
Gibbs: I guess now so do I.

Abby: Luca, this is very special Agent Tony DiNozzo. Tony, this is my little brother Luca.
Tony: It's nice to meet you, Luca. You're under arrest.

NCIS Quotes

McGee: All right. Well you should probably know that Abby and I used to date?
Bishop: Ew. Like, each other?
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: Wait - isn't that a violation of rule 12, never date a....
McGee: It was a long time ago. After we'd broken up, one night I went to her lab. Found a scribbled piece paper; a list. Potential boyfriends had to fulfill certain conditions by a pre-arranged date or else, goodbye.
Bishop: Such as.
McGee: Things started off relatively normal: opening the door for her, flowers, putting the seat down. Then around number 8, it gets uh...
Bishop: What?
McGee: Does she know you have these?
Bishop: Does she know you have these?
McGee: Yeah she wasn't happy when she found out.
Bishop: These are all very specific.
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: These ideas apply to you?
McGee: No those rules weren't in place when we were together. At least I don't think so.
Bishop: What's with the two month cutoff? Abby's sabotaging herself. I've seen stuff like this before. We have to talk to her.

I'm more of a Super-Mario guy, myself.

Captain Wescott