This is one of the obligations of the job… I will never feel comfortable with.

Gibbs [about notification of the suicide]

Fear and guilt are two peas in a pod, Gibbs.


Of course the camera loves Bishop. What’s she got, a wind machine?


McGee: What’d you do to your finger?
Abby: Oh, uh, nothing. I mean, well, I got a splinter. Don’t tell Gibbs, ‘cause he’ll, like, try to dig it out with a knife.

Gibbs: Any problems?
Torres: None, except Bishop almost blowing up our cover, we’re pretty good.
Bishop: Excuse me?
Torres: You shouldn’t have slapped his hand away.
Bishop: I don’t give out free samples! I’ve got three kids to feed and a sick Nana in Boca. [Torres stares at her.] What? You told me to have a backstory. That’s my backstory.
Torres: That’s actually… that’s actually pretty good.
Bishop: Thank you.
McGee: What’s wrong with Nana?
Bishop: Shingles!
Gibbs: Condolences.

Vance: Agent Torres, you disobeyed a direct order!
Torres: I thought it was more a suggestion…
Vance: That’s *not* the direction you want to go in!
Torres: Fine. I made a choice.
Gibbs: Not your call to make, Nick. You put your partner at risk.

She looks more “band camp” than “bad-ass.”

Bishop [regarding a suspect]

McGee: Where’s they go?
Gibbs: Not the question.
McGee: What happened?
Gibbs: *That’s* the question!

Parents always love their kids. No matter what happens.


Vance: Well, it’s your word against your boyfriend’s.
Misty: He just accused me of *murder*. We’re no longer dating.

Chet Goodman: He did save my life. I suppose I owe him something.
Senator Phillips: How about silence?

Bishop: This place is not so sexy.
McGee: I don’t know, the roaches downstairs don’t seem to care.

NCIS Quotes

I'm more of a Super-Mario guy, myself.

Captain Wescott

McGee: All right. Well you should probably know that Abby and I used to date?
Bishop: Ew. Like, each other?
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: Wait - isn't that a violation of rule 12, never date a....
McGee: It was a long time ago. After we'd broken up, one night I went to her lab. Found a scribbled piece paper; a list. Potential boyfriends had to fulfill certain conditions by a pre-arranged date or else, goodbye.
Bishop: Such as.
McGee: Things started off relatively normal: opening the door for her, flowers, putting the seat down. Then around number 8, it gets uh...
Bishop: What?
McGee: Does she know you have these?
Bishop: Does she know you have these?
McGee: Yeah she wasn't happy when she found out.
Bishop: These are all very specific.
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: These ideas apply to you?
McGee: No those rules weren't in place when we were together. At least I don't think so.
Bishop: What's with the two month cutoff? Abby's sabotaging herself. I've seen stuff like this before. We have to talk to her.