NCIS quotes are a big reason to watch the show. The one-liners delivered by the characters in jest and the lightning-quick exchanges as they pertain to the cases make for terrific viewing.
Tony: Maybe that's why we never see Jake. Maybe she ate him.
Bishop: Or maybe he's just busy.
Tony: Or maybe you had him with fava beans, and a nice Chianti
- Permalink: Tony channels Hannibal
Gibbs: So, they won't understand, they don't know you are, they don't know what you've done. We want to help.
Dillon: Well I'm glad to hear that but it's too late sir. I called 911. I tried to help those kids and one's dad.
Gibbs: Yeah but two are alive because of you.
Dillon: There should be three. I hesitated.
Gibbs: Can't blame yourself.
Dillon: He was alive when I got there, he was dead when I left. I know I could have done more.
- Permalink: Self-recrimination
I have the training, you know that. Ever since I got out I can't get a single job in the field. I've been saving to go to medical school. But even if I'm cleared you think anyone will accept me with this on my record? I learn the same as the Army and the Air Force medics and for some reason they come out EMT Basic and they could have legally saved those kids. Why can't I?Dillon
- Permalink: Synopsis of a stupid law
Carrie: Why do you insist on meeting me here? And don't tell me it's the food.
Gibbs: Good people. Honest people. Hungry people. Club sandwich isn't half bad.
Carrie: I'm sorry about your dad.
Gibbs: He would have loved to have met you.
Carrie: Rumor has it he was as challenging as his son.
Gibbs: Yeah well, there's an understatement.
Carrie: I like a good challenge.
- Permalink: I like a good challenge.
Tony: You know the "Men" in "Men's Room" is more of a rule than a suggestion, probie.
Bishop: Look, you two always get to go off giggling to the urinal together and I always get left out. So we're going to talk and we're going to do it here.
- Permalink: Giggling to the urinal
McGee: All right. Well you should probably know that Abby and I used to date?
Bishop: Ew. Like, each other?
Bishop: Wait - isn't that a violation of rule 12, never date a....
McGee: It was a long time ago. After we'd broken up, one night I went to her lab. Found a scribbled piece paper; a list. Potential boyfriends had to fulfill certain conditions by a pre-arranged date or else, goodbye.
Bishop: Such as.
McGee: Things started off relatively normal: opening the door for her, flowers, putting the seat down. Then around number 8, it gets uh...
McGee: Does she know you have these?
Bishop: Does she know you have these?
McGee: Yeah she wasn't happy when she found out.
Bishop: These are all very specific.
Bishop: These ideas apply to you?
McGee: No those rules weren't in place when we were together. At least I don't think so.
Bishop: What's with the two month cutoff? Abby's sabotaging herself. I've seen stuff like this before. We have to talk to her.
- Permalink: Abby's highly-specific rules for dating
Trust us, Bishop. The Abby dating world is a vortex you do not want to get sucked into. Sometimes it's complicated. Just let Abby be Abby.Tony
- Permalink: One rule for Abby, another for Tony
Last week she used chocolate milk to make mashed potatoes.Palmer
- Permalink: Yum
You're under arrest sweetheart.Bishop
- Permalink: You're under arrest sweetheart.
Tony: He followed me, for like two blocks. I couldn't just shut the door on him.
McGee: I thought you didn't like cats.
Tony: I don't. I gave the landlord 48 hours to find him another place to live, or his furry ass is out on the street.
- Permalink: Kitty sets up his home base.
Ducky: Allow me to impart a little bit of wisdom that I have given to each and every aspiring agent before you, on this your probie eval day. Don't fret your number. Jethro gives low scores to push you.
Bishop: Wait. What?
Palmer: The lower your score, the more potential Gibbs thinks you have.
Bishop: So if you got a high score?
Ducky: Then, I would advise you to turn in your badge
- Permalink: Gibb's grading method
Tony: You know, being in here, surrounded by one man's quest to find his friend and give him a proper burial....it's really made me think about the importance of friendship.
McGee: Wow. Thanks Tony.
Tony: Oh not you.
McGee: This is the cat you found.
Tony: Yeah. Rick Blaine. I named him after Humphrey Bogart's character in Casablanca, because of the furry tuxedo.
McGee: You named him?
Tony: Yeah. I'm going to keep him. I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
- Permalink: Here's looking at you, kitty.