Modern Family

Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABC
Modern family
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Haley: Lily what did I just say?
Lily: I don't know, something about shoes probably.

This country's number one export is hot surfers. I'm not gonna buy the first one I see, I'm still browsing.

Haley

Calm down, you're gonna spook the boob.

Luke [to Manny]

Manny: Bondi Beach is topless.
Luke: Thank you Trip Advisor.

Claire: I'm sorry but you know how i am about heights.
Gloria: Is that why you never wear high heels?

Gloria: I don't eat anything unless I know what's in it.
Jay: I've once seen this woman scarf down a pig's nose.

It's a good time to tell you I dropped Luke on his head when he was one.

Jay

Mitchell: This is how Cam's dad sees me, like some fawning damsel.
Jay: If anything, Cam's the damsel.
Mitchell: Dad! Thanks.

C'mon we gotta go! That party's full of sophomores. Those women have lived.

Luke

Back in Vietnam I had Hepatitis, still managed to cook Thanksgiving dinner for 300 soldiers. I think I can handle sauce.

Jay

This hair at a pool party? One dunk and it goes off like an airbag.

Manny

Cam: Hey we got a package from my dad!
Mitchell: No air holes in the box, that's a good sign.
Cam: Lily loved having that chicken.
Mitchell: One more time than she realized.

Displaying quotes 73 - 84 of 1251 in total
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