Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABC
Modern-family

Phil: You're just a worrier, like when you thought he was never gonna talk.
Claire: He was two, and all he could do was bark.
Phil: I understood him.

Manny: If I'm sick, I might get the chaperone sick. And without the chaperone, it's anarchy! The buddy system falls apart; the principal of last-in, first-out is ignored.
Jay: It's butterflies.
Manny: Where?

Cameron: I love Jay, but I don't know about him raising a child.
Mitchell: He raised me.
Cameron: Well now you've put me in an awkward position.

Luke: Smell Heather for me.
Phil: I always do...not.

No way, she plays Lacrosse and plays the cello. Even my reputation can't take that dork hit.

Haley

Luke: One time, she gave me a Woody.
Claire: Sweet J...
Luke: She remembered he's my favorite character from Toy Story.

Mitchell: Did we come at a bad time?
Claire: Come back in five years and seven months when they're all gone!

Claire: Phil, the frying pan is on fire!
Phil: Son of Jor-El! Everybody stay calm!

Jay: Want some coffee?
Manny: Say yes. It's french press. I was doubtful too, but I honestly can't see myself going back to drip.

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