The fact that everyone's lives revolve around a show and to make someone happy with a show, is the most sad, depressing thing.

Kendall

Kim: If it isn't bad enough that Kylie is coming for my throne and we have major beef... she got psoriasis.
Kris: You got psoriasis? I wonder if it's ringworm.

If I want a picture I could look it up online.

Khloe

An ex-box is not the video game, it's like a box of everything with an ex of yours.

Kim

Kris: Do you want shredded cheddar cheese?
Kendall: Does cheese make you fat?

Maybe she's embarrassed she's dating Ronnie from the Jersey Shore... because I would be.

Khloe

Do you feel like Eloise... at the Plaza?

Kris

Kanye was really cute, he was like 'so this is what for better or worse means.'

Kim

He's that cute little f*** from Jersey Shore.

Malika

I need some of that tequila that Cindy Crawford drinks.

Kris

In our family, for some reason, when it rains, it pours.

Khloe

I honestly never thought I would be so grateful just to pee by myself.

Kim