Thursdays 10:00 PM on FX
Its-always-sunny-in-philadelphia

Mac: Well, maybe it boils down to this smart guy: computers are for losers.
Dennis: You're drinking a beer at eight o'clock in the morning!
Mac: Whatever dude. Irrelevant.

Charlie: Did you send him a friend request?
Frank: I don't want to be his friend. I want to shoot him in the face!

Frank: How could you do that?
Barbara: I'm sorry. Would you rather I had them aborted? (looks at Dennis and Dee) Children would you like to have been aborted?

Mac: Then we promise that we will come back with our butts filled.
Charlie: So filled! So filled for you!

Frank: Barbara. Your turkey neck is looking exceptionally attractive this evening.
Barbara: You have turned into a retarded person

Mac: Do you want to shove heroin into your ass?
Charlie: Dude, I don't want to shove anything in my ass!
Mac: All right! This is the perfect opportunity to prove how hard we are, and not have to shove anything up our asses!

Mac: Oh, man, New Orleans really had their s**t figured out!
Dennis: Oh, they totally had their s**t figured out! Except for the levees.
Mac: Right, yeah, except for the levees.

This music sounds like whales raping each other.

Mac

Dee: Where is your breath?
Charlie: In my mouth?
Dee: No, no. It starts in your chest. You got to focus on your diaphragm.
Charlie: What the hell's a diaphragm?

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