Mac: Fight Milk! The first alcoholic dairy based protein drink for bodyguards!
Charlie: By bodyguards! I drink it every morning so I can fight like a crow.

Dennis (to himself): Alright, Lefeve, time to put your money where
your mouth is. Time to kick things up a notch. (turns back to
shirtless tiny Asian boy while unzipping pants)
Tiny Asian Boy (now wearing caddy uniform with golf clubs in front of
him): So, only the one set of clubs?
Dennis (surprised): Yes! Clubs! You're a caddy. This is a golf
(motions with hand) yeah! Good! (re-buckles belt) That's better than
what I was about to - (laughs) Lemme, uh - gimme a minute, I need to
switch gears, I almost - yeah.

Charlie: What do we build?
Frank: We don't build anything. Leave that to the chinks! Speaking of
which, I want this sushi dinner to be the tits!
Charlie: Okay, so you want it to be really expensive.
Frank. No! No! I mean I want to eat it off some Jap broad's tits!

Dennis: How's it going to reflect on me if I promote my bodyguard to
VP after talking to him for 2 minutes at a ballgame?
Mac: It won't reflect on you at all, because you're not Brian Lefeve.
Dennis: I'm not what?
Mac: Dude, you were floundering.
Dennis: I was gathering information so I can more fully become this
man. This has become much more than business. This is about the thrill
of wearing another man's skin. Feeling his innermost wants and
desires. And being in control of his every single move. That's how you
get off. Don't you guys want to get off with me?
Mac: I don't know.
Dee: What?
Dennis: I want you to get off with me. Just follow my lead. 'Cuz we're
gonna get off together. (bites his lip)

Bill: Oh, so you've looked over the proposal?
Dee [as Prudence, in a horrible Canadian accent]: Yah, i sure did and I
tell you what - I seen better lookin' moose turds in Rick Moranis'
backyard, ya hosers.

If we're gonna turn this company around, we gotta start cutting
the crust off this sh*t sandwich!

Andrew Caine: And you are?
Mac: Vic Vinegar. Bodyguard. I don't shake hands, so don't even try.

Mac: Okay, I'm going to run Ops. That door is the only entrance/exit,
so if anyone enters, I'll spring off the balcony.
Dennis: No, no. That's a 50 foot drop.
Mac: And I'm a professional, so I will tuck and roll the landing.
Dennis: You're gonna tuck and roll through a 50 foot drop?
Mac: Dennis, if I had a gun with me, I'd be spraying bullets into the
air as I fell.

Charlie: Frank's taking me under his wing. Teach me how to swim with the sharks.
Dennis: Charlie can't read.
Frank: He'll adapt.
Dennis: He'll adapt to reading?

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia Season 8 Episode 7 Quotes

Mac: Okay, I'm going to run Ops. That door is the only entrance/exit,
so if anyone enters, I'll spring off the balcony.
Dennis: No, no. That's a 50 foot drop.
Mac: And I'm a professional, so I will tuck and roll the landing.
Dennis: You're gonna tuck and roll through a 50 foot drop?
Mac: Dennis, if I had a gun with me, I'd be spraying bullets into the
air as I fell.

Charlie: Frank's taking me under his wing. Teach me how to swim with the sharks.
Dennis: Charlie can't read.
Frank: He'll adapt.
Dennis: He'll adapt to reading?