If we wanted to have sex, we'd just go to a hotel.


One of his concubines had his name tattooed on her ass. I have more important things to do than search for another female member of the Bart Bass fan club.


Chastity belts go very well with formal wear.


Serena: Did I tell you that he texts me every night before he goes to sleep? It's so sweet.
Blair: Sexting is not sweet. It's off-limits until you're in a relationship.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. Seems Dickens knew something about life on the Upper East Side.

Maureen: It's my personal opinion that Serena's just a phase.
Tripp: I do care about my career, but not more than I care about Serena. I just want to be clear about that.

I'm not a huge advocate of the downtrodden but I am a fan of not stepping on them when I'm at John Derian. If you turn these into lofts then where are they going to live?


[to J] Queen Bee likes the thrill, huh? Stick with me Jenny Humphrey and you'll have enough cash to run your entire kingdom.


Chuck: Lily?
Woman: [at Bart's grave] Charles!

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