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Leela: Impressive. They're busting mad rhymes with an 80% success rate.
Bender: I believe that qualifies as ill. At least from a technical standpoint.
- Permalink: Impressive. They're busting mad rhymes with an 80% success rate....
Y'know, as a major Hollywood director, I'll be holding auditions tonight for my next movie. And even though you're all young and naive, I think you might just have what it takes.Bender
- Permalink: Y'know, as a major Hollywood director, I'll be holding auditions...
Fry: Bender, are you alright?
Bender: No! Oh, they're tormenting me with up-tempo singing and dancing.
- Permalink: Bender, are you alright? No! Oh, they're tormenting me with up...
Leela: Bender, we didn't mind your drinking, or your kleptomania, or your pornography ring.
Zoidberg: In fact, that's why we loved you.
- Permalink: Bender, we didn't mind your drinking, or your kleptomania, or yo...
Bender: Don't worry, guys. I'll never be too good or too evil again. From now on, I'll just be me.
Leela: Uh... Do you think you could be a little less evil than that?
Bender: I don't know... Do you think you could survive a seven-hundred foot fall?
Fry: (chuckles) Good ol' Bender.
- Permalink: Don't worry, guys. I'll never be too good or too evil again. Fro...
Wow! An old-fashioned mosh pit! Come on, guys. Tonight we're gonna party like its 1999 ... again.Fry
- Permalink: Wow! An old-fashioned mosh pit! Come on, guys. Tonight we're gon...
Bender: Um, I'm only hallucinating this, right?
(The Robot Devil cracks his whip; Bender yelps.)
Robot Devil: No, Bender! Robot Hell is quite real! Here's our brochure. (hands Bender a brochure entitled "Hell Is Other Robots")
Bender: But I don't belong here! I don't like things that are scary and painful!
Robot Devil: Sorry, Bender. You agreed to this when you joined our religion. If you sin, you go to Robot Hell... (evilly) for all eternity!
Bender: Aw, hell... I mean heck!
Robot Devil: It's alright, you can say that here.
- Permalink: Um, I'm only hallucinating this, right? No, Bender! Robot He...
Robot Hell Song:
Robot Devil: Cigars are evil,
You won't miss 'em,
We'll find ways to simulate that smell,
What a sorry fella,
Rolled up and smoked like a donnetela,
Here on Level One of Robot Hell.
Robot Devil: Gambling's wrong and so is cheating,
So is forging phoney IOU's,
Let's let Lady Luck decide,
What type of torture's justified,
I'm pit boss here on Level Two.
Robot Devil: Ooo, deep-fried robot!
Bender: Just tell me why...
Robot Devil: Check out this 55-page warrant.
Bender: There must be robots worse than I...
Robot Devil: We've checked it out; there really aren't.
Bender: Then please let me explain,
My crimes were merely boy-ish pranks...
Robot Devil: You stole from boy scouts, nuns, and banks!
Bender: Ah, don't blame me;
Blame my upbringing!
Robot Devil: Please stop sinning while I'm singing!
Robot Devil: Selling bootleg tapes is wrong,
Musicians need that income to survive.
Beastie Boys: Hey, Bender, gonna make some noise,
With your hard drive scratched by the Beastie Boys!
That's whatcha, whatcha, whatcha get on Level Five!
Fry: I don't feel well...
Leela: It's up to us to rescue him.
Fry: Maybe he likes it here in Hell...
Leela: It's us who tempted him to sin.
Fry: Maybe he's back at the motel...
Leela: Come on, Fry, don't be scared,
I'm sure at least one of us will be spared,
So just sit back, enjoy the ride.
Fry: My ass has blisters from the slide!
Robot Devil: Fencing diamonds,
Publishing indecent magazines,
You'll pay for every crime,
Knee-deep in electric slime,
You'll suffer till the end of time,
Enduring tortures, most of which rhyme,
Trapped forever here in Robot Hell!
- Permalink: Cigars are evil, You won't miss 'em, We'll find ways to simu...
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, here to lay down some old, old, incredibly old school beats: The Beastie Boys!
- Permalink: The Beastie Boys!
Hermes: And as a further cost-cutting measure, I have eliminated the salt-water cooler.
Zoidberg: This is a witch hunt!
- Permalink: And as a further cost-cutting measure, I have eliminated the sal...
Fry: Come on, it'll be fun! Maybe we could even drink a little fortified wine.
Bender: What? Drinking wine is a sin. Even if it is deliciously fortified.
Leela: Hey, Bender, look at that woman's purse. It's hanging by a spaghetti strand.
Bender: Thou shalt not snatch.
Fry: And there's Hookerbot 5000. She's got a heart of solid gold!
- Permalink: Come on, it'll be fun! Maybe we could even drink a little fortif...
Leela: (hanging on to Bender while flying out) Hurry, Bender!
Bender: I could, if you dropped that stupid gold violin!
Leela: Oh, sorry. (lets go of the gold fiddle and it lands on the Robot Devil)
- Permalink: Hurry, Bender! I could, if you dropped that stupid gold violin...