Bender: Um, I'm only hallucinating this, right?
(The Robot Devil cracks his whip; Bender yelps.)
Robot Devil: No, Bender! Robot Hell is quite real! Here's our brochure. (hands Bender a brochure entitled "Hell Is Other Robots")
Bender: But I don't belong here! I don't like things that are scary and painful!
Robot Devil: Sorry, Bender. You agreed to this when you joined our religion. If you sin, you go to Robot Hell... (evilly) for all eternity!
Bender: Aw, hell... I mean heck!
Robot Devil: It's alright, you can say that here.

Leela: Do you know how to play the fiddle?
Fry: No. Do you?
Leela: No, but I used to play the drums. They're sorta similar.

Fry: I know Big Vinnie said he was giving me the kiss of death but I still think he was gay.
Leela: Did he use his tongue?
Fry: A little.

Leela: Alright, Beelzebot... What'll it take to get our friend back?
Robot Devil: Sorry, but I hold all the cards here. There's nothing I can do. (pulls out a pen and sheet of paper) Now, if you'll just sign this fiddle contest waiver...
(Fry reaches out for the pen and Leela slaps it out of his hand.)
Leela: Wait. What fiddle contest?
Robot Devil: (sighs roughly) The Fairness In Hell Act of 2275 requires me to inform you that if you can best me in a fiddle contest, you win back Bender's soul... as well as a solid gold fiddle.
Fry: Wouldn't a solid gold fiddle weigh hundreds of pounds and sound crummy?
Robot Devil: Well, it's mostly for show.

Hermes: And as a further cost-cutting measure, I have eliminated the salt-water cooler.
Zoidberg: This is a witch hunt!

Preacherbot: I see a lot of fancy robots here today, made of real shiny metal. But that don't impress the Robot Devil, no, sir!
Vergerbot: No, sir!
Preacherbot: 'Cause if you're a sinner, he's gonna plug his infernal modem in the wall, belchin' smoke and flame. And he's gonna download you straight to Robot Hell!

Leela: What in hell happened to Bender?
Fry: Well he didn't check out. The ashtray's still here. Look, Nibbler's caught the scent of vodka and motor oil!

Leela: (hanging on to Bender while flying out) Hurry, Bender!
Bender: I could, if you dropped that stupid gold violin!
Leela: Oh, sorry. (lets go of the gold fiddle and it lands on the Robot Devil)

Mon, I'm hungrier than a green snake in a sugar cane field!


Fender: Hey, Bender!
Bender: Hey, Fender! Man, I haven't seen you since high school. You still workin' at Jack In The Box?
Fender: Not anymore, buddy! I'm with the band!

Robot Devil: We know all your sins, Bender! And for each one we've prepared an agonising and ironic punishment! (turns head) Gentlemen...
(A robot band plays up-tempo music.)
Bender: Ah, crap. Singing... Mind if I smoke?

Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, here to lay down some old, old, incredibly old school beats: The Beastie Boys!

Futurama Season 1 Quotes

Fry: Hurry up! I wanna see the Moon!
Leela: Relax. It's open 'till 9.

Space; It seems to go on and on forever...but then you get to the end and a gorilla starts throwing barrels at you.