Monica: I read an article the other day that said you're not supposed to throw rice at weddings, because when pigeons eat it, it kills them.
Richard: So that's why you never see pigeons in sushi bars.

Chandler: (Realizing his internet girl is Janice) Oh my God!
Janice: Oh... my... God! (Chandler rushes over and kisses her)
Ross, Joey, Rachel, Phoebe: Oh... my... God!

Phoebe: We're just trying to figure out if Chandler's girlfriend is a girl.
Joey: Oh, well just ask her how long she's gonna live. Women live longer than men.
Chandler: How do you not fall down more?

Monica: (About their future) Do you see a little bassinet in the corner?
Richard: Like a hound?
Monica: Not a basset. A bassinet.
Richard: You really need the bassinet?
Monica: Well, I just think the baby would keep falling off the dog.

Monica: Joey, you know, maybe you're just not used to kissing men. Maybe you just tensed up a little bit. Maybe that's what you need to work on.
Joey: Yeah, that makes sense.
(Joey looks over at Ross)
Ross: Over my dead body.
(Joey looks over at Chandler)
Chandler: And I'll be using his dead body as a shield.

(About being forced to wear a bright pink, fluffy bridesmaid dress) I cannot believe I have to walk down the aisle in front of 200 looking like something you drink when you're nauseous.

Rachel

Joey: Come on, Chandler. I want this part so much. Just one kiss. I won't tell anyone.
Chandler: Joey, no means no!

Chandler: She's married. She has a husband.
Phoebe: What if the husband person is the wrong guy and you are the right guy. You don't get chances like this all the time. If you don't meet her now, you're going to be kicking yourself when you're 80, which is hard to do and that's how you break a hip.

(Making a toast) I remember when Barry came back from his first date with Rachel... (To Barry) What? You hired the same band, I can't use the same speech?

Joel

Rachel: Why the hell didn't you tell me!
Ross: I'm sorry. What was I supposed to do? Stand up and shout "Hey, Rachel, your butt is showing!"
Rachel: Yeah, better you than Barry's uncle. Oh, my God this is so humiliating. I think the only thing that tops that was, was, was when I was in the eight grade and I had to sing the "Copacabana" in front of the entire school. I think I got about two lines into it before I ran and freaked out. Oh, my God, my entire life is flashing before my eyes.
Ross: Rach, hey look, I remember that, it wasn't so bad.
Rachel: Oh Ross, would you stop, you got me, I'm dating you.

Chandler, you have got to stop staring at that door. It's like a watched pot. If you keep watching it, the door is never gonna boil.

Phoebe

Phoebe: You don't want to see a face that's covered with pox.
Ryan: Your face could be covered with lox, I wouldn't care!

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 431 in total

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Friends Season 2 Quotes

Chandler: Joey's tailor... took advantage of me.
Ross: What?
Joey: No way, I've been going to the guy for twelve years.
Chandler: Oh come on, he said he was going to do my inseem, then he ran his hand up my leg and then there was definite...
Ross: What? (Chandler closes his eyes)
Chandler: Cupping.
Joey: That's how they do pants! First they go up one side, they move it over, then they go up the other side then they move it back, and then they do the rear. Ross, will you tell him. Isn't that how a tailor measures pants?
Ross: Yes, yes it is... in prison!

Jade: (A voice on the answering machine) Hello, I'm looking for Bob. This is Jane. I don't know if you're still at this number, but I was just thinking about us, and how great it was, and, well, I know it's been three years, but, I was kinda hoping we could hook up again. I barely had the nerve to make this call, so you know what I did?
Chandler: (Talking to himself) What?
Jade: I got a little drunk ... and naked.
Chandler: Bob here. (He picks up the telephone) What've you been up to?

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